tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-39961102012-02-13T11:22:35.344+08:00balita, tsismis at listahan ng mga paborito, mga ayaw at utang...BatJaynoreply@blogger.comBlogger671100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1138143474634277582006-01-25T06:57:00.000+08:002006-01-25T06:58:36.110+08:00<a href="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/"><img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-012.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> <img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-001.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> <img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-008.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> </a><br /><a href="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/"><img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-017.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> <img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-030.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> <img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-025.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> </a><br /><a href="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/"><img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-007.JPG" alt=JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> <img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-005.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> <img src="http://www.nicanordavid.com/kodakan/SARASOTA06/thumbs/SARASOTA-002.JPG" alt="JAY AND JET IN SARASOTA WITH ESTER AND RANDY" /> </a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-113814347463427758?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1092878691275795062004-08-19T09:24:00.000+08:002004-08-19T09:24:51.276+08:00I've been really busy lately. So busy that I'm starting to break out -- a sure sign of work-related stress. But instead of attempting to touch your hearts with a tale about my long battle with acne, today, I have decided to redirect you to one of many on-line "pastures" I enjoy -- where the grass is greener, the writing touches or tickles, and zit puss is non-existent. <br /> <br />The first stop on this tour of the www is the home page of a guy from the land where unemployment is low, cigarette boxes have pictures of dead babies and chewing gum is frowned upon. Meet Batjay. <br /> <br />While I am faking my comfort with the English language (you could almost hear my faux American twang, can't you?), Batjay keeps it real. His Taglish blog reads like a conversation with that fun, shoot-from-the-hip neighbor who you were forbidden to play with as your mom was afraid you would have too much fun. <br /> <br />We have not met yet; but in my head (ergo, I am making this up), Batjay sounds like the kind of guy who starts a Saturday night with a quiet dinner and ends it by jumping off an illegal gambling barge in the middle of South China Sea after he accidentally set fire to it while running from the dealers he duped at the black jack table. Or at the very least, the kind of guy who would lug a huge Spiderman doll on his international business trips so he could photograph it (now that, I did not make up). <br /> <br />This ex-disk jockey, now a conference-speaker-slash-engineer can dish out a delicious bwakananginangyan and revel us with daily narratives about how something new or funny or silly or amazing has enriched his life. Believe me, there is a lot of wisdom in the stuff he thinks about while picking his nose on the train. <br /> <br />He is one of the nicest guys I have never met. If only he wasn't so in love with and married to the love of his life, Jet, I would definitely set him up with my sister. <div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-109287869127579506?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1092878354570673002004-08-19T09:19:00.000+08:002004-08-19T09:19:14.570+08:00Thanks to Mona and her entry about forgetfulness, I stumbled upon BatJay's Kwentong Tambay blog. It's such a Pinoy blog, what with the Taglish, the humor, and the expressions that make it seem he's right beside you. But I'm particularly drawn towards his January 15, 2004 post entitled: Happy Birthday MyLab (Happy Birthday, My Love). <br /> <br />It is a post of gratitude, nostalgia, hope, success, and that characteristic Pinoy humor that accompanies our usual crisis-filled lives. <br /> <br />Head on over, at magparamdam naman kayo. (Leave a comment at BatJay's spot on the web.) <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-109287835457067300?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1087796053608114242004-06-21T13:34:00.000+08:002004-06-21T13:34:13.606+08:00<a href="http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_989213.html?menu=news.quirkies.sportingquirkies">Man beaten with remote control after watching England-France Match</a> <br /> <br />"A Malaysian man who sneaked out of bed to watch England's Euro 2004 opener was assaulted by his wife who was armed with the TV remote control. <br /> <br />The man's wife also took the smart card from their pay television service to prevent him from watching future live soccer, says the Malaysian Star." <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-108779605360811424?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1080911039592057482004-04-02T21:03:00.000+08:002004-04-02T21:22:35.000+08:00<a href="http://search.yahoo.com/search?fr=fp-pull-web-t&p=bangungot ng bayan">Yahoo! Search Results for bangungot ng bayan</a>? <br /> <br /><a href="http://fpj.org.ph/Home.htm">bangunot ng bayan</a>! wahahahahahahaha... kawawa naman tayo! <a href="http://fpj.org.ph/Home.htm">huwag iboto</a> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-108091103959205748?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1068271001517781152003-11-08T13:56:00.000+08:002003-11-15T13:02:09.390+08:00burning grass, <br />summer days, <br />moon lit nights, <br />childhood games <br /> <br />daily walks, <br />playful dog, <br />early mornings, <br />before the dawn. <br /> <br />little lad, looking sad <br />little boy, full of joy <br /> <br />living together <br />for so long <br />life is fine <br />like good wine <br /> <br />the boss' wife <br />singing "love's glory" <br />no apologies <br />for my life story. <br /> <br />going away <br />life's a journey <br />one hello <br />i gotta go. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106827100151778115?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1067253763049135142003-10-27T19:22:00.000+08:002003-10-27T19:22:48.093+08:00<a href="http://www.worldtimeserver.com/?locationid=US-CA">The Current Time in California</a>. Kailangan ko ito sa trabaho and need to be reminded of this link. Heehee. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106725376304913514?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1064058183998130282003-09-20T19:43:00.000+08:002003-09-20T19:43:03.533+08:00<a href="http://www.msnbc.com/news/969195.asp?0cv=KA01">What $87 Billion Buys</a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106405818399813028?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1063951191965108682003-09-19T13:59:00.000+08:002003-09-19T13:59:52.133+08:00<a href="http://www.singaporefoodexpo.org.sg/html/main.html">This week is the week of the Singapore Food Expo 2003</a>. malapit lang ang venue nito sa office namin. kung kaya, kaninang lunch doon kami kumain... ang galing. sa taste test pa lang mabubusog ka na! <br /> <br />kung taga singapore ka. try to visit the food expo. maraming mga sale na items at mas maraming nga pagkain na binibenta. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106395119196510868?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1063781962552496272003-09-17T14:59:00.000+08:002003-09-17T14:59:21.933+08:00Subject: Qantas-Pilot & Engineer Dialogue <br /> <br />Original internal Qantas email <br /> <br />After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. <br /> <br />The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. <br /> <br />Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humour. <br /> <br />Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. <br /> <br /> <br />(P = The problem logged by the pilot.) <br />( S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.) <br /> <br /> <br /> <br />P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement. <br />S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. <br />S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Something loose in cockpit. <br />S: Something tightened in cockpit. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Dead bugs on windshield. <br />S: Live bugs on back-order. <br /> <br /> <br />P : Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. <br />S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. <br />S: Evidence removed. <br /> <br /> <br />P: DME volume unbelievably loud. <br />S: DME volume set to more believable level. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. <br />S: That's what they're there for. <br /> <br /> <br />P: IFF inoperative. <br />S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Suspected crack in windshield. <br />S: Suspect you're right. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Number 3 engine missing. <br />S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Aircraft handles funny. <br />S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Target radar hums. <br />S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Mouse in cockpit. <br />S: Cat installed. <br /> <br /> <br />P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. <br />S: Took hammer away from midget. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106378196255249627?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1063160713222445592003-09-10T10:25:00.000+08:002003-09-10T10:25:13.200+08:00<a href="http://www.apple.com.sg/ipod/">ang bago naming laruan ni batjet!</a> sana naman dahil dito, ganahan na akong mag jogging. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106316071322244559?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1062989955705780342003-09-08T10:59:00.000+08:002003-09-08T10:59:15.710+08:00<a href="http://www.iacenter.org/bush_answer903.htm">A.N.S.W.E.R. COALITION RESPONDS TO PRESIDENT BUSH'S NATIONAL TELEVISION ADDRESS OF SEPTEMBER 7, 2003</a> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106298995570578034?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1062920100327323652003-09-07T15:35:00.000+08:002003-09-07T22:15:09.503+08:00<u><strong>INTERESTING SEARCH WORDS USED TO GET TO MY SITE:</strong></u> <br /> <br />ang bading, ping lacson <br />bakit ang unggoy mahilig sa saging? <br />lumpia <br />sabong! <br />kwentong aray <br />tuli na pilipino <br />pano mo malalaman pag may gusto ko sa isang guy?? <br />george estregan <br />scientific names of dylan baka <br />mga GRO ng pasay <br />libog ng pinay <br />sec bomb girls spaghetti song <br />gamot sa libog <br />kwentong pek-pek <br />cubicle farts covering <br />jakol <br />ekis pics <br />ang paboritong kwento ni hudas <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106292010032732365?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1062597602937703502003-09-03T22:00:00.000+08:002003-09-03T22:05:51.700+08:00<a href="http://www.geocities.com/notredamebatch83/kanta">Go east of your dream and farm. <br />Let peace and silence spin your yarn. <br />What harm can befall thee <br />in yon wilderness of clove? <br /> <br />Go on east of ginger trees. <br />Go soft and silent like the breeze. <br />With ease be off and wander <br />in yon wilderness of clove. <br /> <br />Go on past the goldenrods, <br />where fools and angels lose their odds. <br />And gods of our ancestors <br />did immerse themselves in clove. <br />Go on toward the crimson shore, <br />beyond this life of metaphors. <br />Where doors of understanding's house <br />decorates he them with clove.</a> <br /> <br /><a href="http://www.sealsandcrofts.com/lyricssb.html#eastofgingertrees">"East of Ginger Trees"</a>, <a href="http://www.sealsandcrofts.com/">Seals & Crofts</a> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106259760293770350?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1062577530490682502003-09-03T16:25:00.000+08:002003-09-03T16:25:30.450+08:00Here's some nakakatawang sagot ng mga kontestant sa Philippine version ng <br />Weakest Link hosted by Edu Manzano: <br /> <br />EDU: Anong uring hayop ang lion? <br />CONTESTANT: (syempre, nag-isip pa) Ah, reptile! <br /> <br />EDU: ano sa Spanish ang hello? <br />CONTESTANT: uhhh...... ADIOS!!! <br /> <br />EDU: anong tawag sa manok na nangingitlog? <br />CONTESTANT: HIN! <br />EDU: correct! <br /> <br />EDU: Sino ang american president na nagkapolyo noong 1920's? <br />Encoder: Apolinario Mabini <br /> <br />Q: Anong uri ng hayop si King Kong? <br />A: Pagong! <br />Q: Sa'n mo nakuha yan? <br />A: Sa Batibot po... si King Kong Pagong?!! <br /> <br />EDU: Yes or no -- ang salad dressing ba ay damit? <br />CONTESTANT: (slight pause) YES! <br /> <br />EDU: Sino ang unang Pilipinong namatay sa lethal injection? <br />CONTESTANT: (after a millisecond) si Echee-vehry! <br />Parang pinatay nya ulit si Echegaray. <br /> <br />EDU: ilan ang f sa phosphorus??? <br />CONTESTANT: uhm. . . 3!!! <br /> <br />EDU: ilang araw ang misa de gallo? <br />CONTESTANT: 16! <br /> <br />EDU: ano ang mas malaki? itlog ng pugo o sanggol ng tao? <br />CONTESTANT: itlog ng pugo! <br />EDU: saan ba ang probinsya mo? <br />CONTESTANT: wala po..sa manila lang <br />EDU: san ka ba nakakita ng itlog ng pugo na mas malaki sa sanggol ng tao? <br />CONTESTANT: akala ko po kasi ser sabi nyo eh itlog ng tao! <br />(and this guy actually won!) <br />Sagot pa ni Edoods: Ang laki naman atang itlog ng pugo yon! <br /> <br />EDU: Ilang unggoy meron sa grupong "The Monkees" <br />CONTESTANT: Lima! <br />EDU: Wala! <br /> <br />EDU: Ilan ang legs ng cartoon character na si Spiderman? <br />DENNIS: Eight! <br /> <br />Sa pelikulang Johnny Mnemonic, anong titik nag uumpisa ang Mnemonic? <br />Answer: P <br /> <br />EDU: Anong uri ng halaman ang tumitiklop kapag ito'y <br />nahawakan? <br />CONTESTANT: Hiya-hiya! <br /> <br />EDU: ano ang ginagamit ng mga swimmers para bumilis ang kanilang paglangoy? <br />CONTESTANT: fast shoes <br /> <br />EDU: saan nilalagay ang pacemaker? <br />CONTESTANT: sa face?! <br /> <br />EDU: Kung si superman ay may Lois Lane, ano naman ang kay Robinhood? <br />CONTESTANT: Pana!! <br /> <br />EDU: Sino ang vocalist ng Side A? <br />CONTESTANT: (nasa dulo na ng dila ko eh) Jo..Jograd! <br />bwahahahaha <br /> <br />anong S ang inuupuan pag naka-sakay sa kabayo??? <br />answer: SILYA!!! hehe! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang karaniwang hugis ng manibela? <br />CONTESTANT: Triangular? <br /> <br />EDU: saang continent matatagpuan ang Indonesia? <br />CONTESTANT: ahh... JAVA!!! <br /> <br />EDU: sa PC o sa paglalaro ano ang tawag kapag ikaw ay natalo o tapos na ang <br />laro? <br />CONTESTANT: Finished? <br />EDU: Ikaw ba ay naglalaro ng games? <br />CONTESTANT: Hindi.. <br />EDU: Ingat ka lng at baka sa dulo ikaw ang ma- GAME OVER <br /> <br />EDU: kelan ang pasko sa DAVAO? <br />CONTESTANT: PASS!!!! <br />EDU: kung si tweety ay ibon, anong hayop si TAZ? <br />CONTESTANT: UNGGOY!!!! <br />EDU: ano ang mas nauna sumikat, celfone o pager? <br />CONTESTANT: RADIO!!!! <br /> <br />EDU: Ang Void ba ay Invalid o Valid <br />GOGO: Valid <br /> <br />November 12 edition of The Weakest Link <br />EDU: Ilan ang letrang A sa salitang Philippines? <br />CONTESTANT: Um, um...isa! <br /> <br />EDU: Ang ibig sabihin ba ng LSD ay Lason Sa Daga? <br />Allen: Um...oo! <br />EDU: Ah, so kaya pala nalulong sina Jimi Hendrix noong araw ay dahil sa <br />lason sa daga? <br /> <br />EDU:Ang iyong tv radio at computer ba ay may thermostat? <br />CONTESTANT:isip....meron... <br />comment ni EDU: So pag nagooverheat ang tv mo bigla na lang nagshuhutdown? <br />CONTESTANT: akala ko nasama mo yung aircon... <br />EDU: so kasalanan ko pa ngayon?! <br /> <br />EDU: what is the capital of Romania ? <br />CONTESTANT: (nagisip) Romania City <br /> <br />EDU : ano ang tawag sa mga needle-like projections na nakasabit sa roof ng <br />mga caves? <br />CONTESTANT : (nagmamadali pa) uh, ice pick ? <br /> <br />EDU: Nano, fill in the blank: Bayan kong Pilipinas, lupain ng ginto't <br />____________ <br />Nano: SILANGAN! (sabay tingin sa camera with this very funny face) <br /> <br />EDU: Ano sa tagalog ang "No Loitering?" <br />CONTESTANT: Bawal Magkalat! <br /> <br />EDU: Sino and tauhan sa barko na tinatawag na skipper? <br />CONTESTANT: POPEYE! <br /> <br />EDU: Paano i-describe ang mga ulo ni Yul Brynner at Telly Savalas? <br />CONTESTANT: .......................Patusok? <br /> <br />EDU: ano ang kulay ng orange juice kapag nilagay sa blue na baso? <br />CONTESTANT: ...violet <br /> <br />EDU: Saan natatatakot ang taong may PHOTOPHOBIA? <br />CONTESTANT: sa mga LITRATO <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang tawag sa plastik na lalagyan ng basura? <br />CONTESTANT: Plastik Bag na nilalagyan ng basura? <br /> <br />EDU: anong nilalagay sa pinto kapartner ng susi? <br />CONTESTANT: doorknob! <br /> <br />EDU: Ilang parte meron ang three-fold? <br />Caloy: *isip pa ng matagal* uhm.. FOUR! <br /> <br />EDU: Ilang roses ang binibigay sa isang debutant? <br />Caloy pa rin: Tatlo! (ano yon I love you?!?) <br /> <br />EDU: Sino nagsulat ng Bridges of Madison County? <br />CONTESTANT: uh.. Clint Eastwood... <br /> <br />EDU: Anong hayop ang di nakakakita sa araw ngunit nakakakita sa dilim? <br />Ans: (isip konti) then answered... FLASHLIGHT! <br /> <br />EDU: ano ang tawag sa laro kung saan ang 2 teams ay naghihilahan sa isang <br />lubid? <br />CONTESTANT (listening attentively, ang walang aling na sagot ay...): <br />tumbang-preso <br /> <br />EDU: ang urine ay liquid. true or false? <br />KIKO: false <br />EDU: anong "c" ang paboritong kainin ng mga rabbit? <br />KIKO: sea ("c") cacamber <br /> <br />EDU: ano ang system of math na gumagamit ng symbols instead of numbers? <br />CONTESTANT: umm...China? <br /> <br />EDU: Ano yung maliliit na butil na niluluto sa sinaing <br />TZARI: Salt/Asin <br /> <br />EDU: Anong tawag sa taong walang suot sa paa? <br />CONTESTANT: SLIPPERLESS! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang tawag sa pag-aaral ng mga 'poisonous substances'? <br />CONTESTANT: Uh...poisonology? <br /> <br />EDU: ang rooster ba mangingitlog, TRUE OR FALSE <br />CONTESTANT: TRUE <br /> <br />EDU: ano ang shape ng bola ng basketball? <br />CONTESTANT: OBLONG???? <br /> <br />EDU:anong ginawa ni moses sa red sea? <br />CONTESTANT: Stop! <br /> <br />EDU: kung ang bulag ay blind , ano naman ang english ng pipi? <br />CONTESTANT: walang salita! <br /> <br />EDU: anong sea creature and kalahating kabayo at kalahating isda? <br />CONTESTANT: syokoy!!!! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang tawag sa kaisa-isang babaeng miyembro ng "The Smurfs" <br />CONTESTANT: Gumby! <br /> <br />EDU: anong klaseng sasakyan ang inaayos sa hangar? <br />fat guy who's into advertising but took up veterinary: uhmm. . . sirang <br />sasakyan???? <br />EDU: ano ang trabaho ni Jim carrey sa Ace Ventura? <br />fat guy ulet (with great conviction): VETERINARIAN!!!! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang tawag sa isang lugar sa disyerto na may mga halaman at lilim <br />(or something like that)? <br />Rico: Blessed place? <br />EDU: Kung ang shipboat ay isang boat, ano ang u-boat? <br />Rico: boat! <br /> <br />EDU: anong nilalagay sa inflatable tire? <br />CONTESTANT: (thinks for a while) pera! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang nilalagay sa sewing machine? <br />CONTESTANT: Lagari? (Akala yata nito may sawing machine eh) <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang nationality ni Sigmund Freud? Austrian o Danish? <br />Mil: U.S.? <br />EDU: Saang state matatagpuan ang Golden Gate Bridge sa San Francisco? <br />Allan: U.S.? <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang tawag sa laman sa loob ng buto, marrow o muscle? <br />CONTESTANT: KARNE!!! <br />EDU: Saan matatagpuan ang Quebec? <br />CONTESTANT: Afghanistan! (nasobrahan ata ito sa kakapanood ng CNN) <br />EDU: Ilang taon meron sa isang leap year? <br />CONTESTANT: 365! (ang dami naman!) <br />EDU: Anong sinusuot ng mga boksingero sa ulo nila para sa proteksyon? <br />CONTESTANT: Sumbrero <br />EDU: Sa lithography, ano ang sinusulat mo? <br />CONTESTANT: Literature? <br /> <br />EDU: kung ang isang piraso ng chico ay 5 pesos , magkano ito lahat kung 25 <br />pcs.? <br />CONTESTANT: 250 pesos <br /> <br />EDU: ilan ang sides ng octagon? <br />CONTESTANT: seven! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang Kulay ni Incredible Hulk? <br />CONTESTANT: BLACK! <br />TAONG GRASA BA SI INCREDIBLE HULK!.. <br /> <br />EDU: ilang metro mayroon sa 300 meters <br />ruth: 3000? <br />anakanangtetorts.. <br /> <br />EDU: ang B.O.I. ay parte ng Department of Trade and Industry. Ano ang ibig <br />sabihin nito? <br />DODONG: Department of Tourism and Industry <br /> <br />EDU: anong "Q" ang dating kapital ng Pilipinas? <br />CONTESTANT: Manila! <br />sinabi nang "Q" eh!!! <br /> <br />EDU: Saang story ung "Mirror mirror in the wall" ? <br />CONTESTANT (Abdul) : Uhmmm....... Cinderella. <br /> <br />EDU: Anong laro ang may freethrow? <br />CONTESTANT (Jessa): Volleyball <br /> <br />Si Albert <br />EDU: anong sasakyan ang gamit sa "tour de France?" <br />albert: (ang sagot na naman nya eh) kalesa <br />EDU: anong klaseng animal ang afghan hound? <br />albert: afghanistan <br />(joskopo!) <br />EDU: ano ang tawag sa mga animal na mga kumakain ng insects <br />albert: amphibian <br />Important note: kung meron sa inyong me kilala ke albert, LAYUAN NINYO <br />SIYAAA!!! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang primary ingredient sa paggawa ng cheese? <br />CONTESTANT: CHEESE! <br /> <br />EDU: Sino ang patriarch (or something to that effect) sa Addams Family? <br />CONTESTANT: um... si Adam? <br /> <br />Q: Sinong "B.S." ang isa sa sumulat ng kantang "Evergreen"? <br />A: Bruce Springsteen! <br /> <br />EDU: Tinuturo ang G-clef sa anong "M" na subject? <br />CONTESTANT: Mathematics!!! <br />EDU (and the rest of us): Akala ko ba magaling ka sa music?!... <br />CONTESTANT: (Tagalog ang tanong, English ang sagot niya) I don't know, it <br />was the first thing that came out of my mouth, that's why I spoke it out <br />immediately! <br /> <br />EDU: Ano sa English ang maliit na baka? <br />CONTESTANT: COWLET! <br />Albert din yata yung name niya eh... <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang communication device sa loob ng telephone booth? <br />Edgar: Microphone <br />EDU: Ano ang itlog na ayon sa iba, nakakapatigas ng tuhod? <br />Edgar: Tama! <br />He gave out both these answers in the same round and at the end of the <br />round, guess who was the weakest link? <br /> <br />SI DAVID? <br />DOODS: Ano ang karaniwang ginagamit na pagkain na kasabay ng Kare-kare? <br />DAVID: dried fish <br />DOODS: 8 times 9? <br />DAVID: 71 (accountant yan!!) <br />DOODS: David, ano ang tawag sa device na pinangsisipsip mo ng tubig? <br />DAVID: (thinks long and hard) aahhh... HOSE? <br />DOODS:ano ang pangalan ni Padre Zamora, na kabilang sa mga paring GOMBURZA? <br />DAVID: (thinks hard)....GOMA! <br />DOODS: Saang lenguahe nagmula ang salitang 'faux pas"? <br />DAVID: Chinese! <br /> <br />EDU: san matatagpuan ang glorietta? <br />CONTESTANT: mandaluyong! (mukhang kakalabas lang niya...yehey!!!) <br /> <br />EDU: Anong zip ang ginagamit sa pagbukas ng pantalon? <br />CONTESTANT: pagbukas ng bag <br /> <br />Q: Sa anong letter nagtatapos ang salitang "naive"? <br />A: H? <br /> <br />EDU : Anong D ang first word sa first stanza ng Jingle Bells <br />(answer should be Dashing) <br />CONTESTANT : Dyingel? <br /> <br />EDU: Kung ang tagalog ng Who ay "sino", ano naman ang tagalog ng Why? <br />CONTESTANT: Uhm....Electricity? (ang labo!!!) <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang ibig sabihin ng...ERSTWHILE? <br />CONTESTANT: (with confidence and agitation)... NASA EARTH!!! <br /> <br />q: anong H ang tawag sa taong nag-iisa.... <br />a: HOME ALONE.... <br /> <br />EDU: sinong lalaking artista ang bida sa A Walk in the Clouds <br />CONTESTANT: niño muhlach <br /> <br />EDU: Ano ang tawag sa bala ng gluegun? <br />CONTESTANT: (confident na confident) BULLET! <br /> <br />Sa Head to Head <br />EDU: Anong kanta ni Christopher Cross ang nanalo as Best Song of the Year <br />noong 1972 (? not so sure that this was how the question was phrased) <br />Chris: Uh... Sailboat? <br /> <br />EDU: Complete the phrase: Share a seat, win a blank (medyo nabingi yung <br />CONTESTANT so she asked EDU to repeat the question ..) After EDU repeated <br />the question, di pa din niya ma-gets. Finally, she answered ...... OLD <br />LADY!!! <br /> <br />EDU: ano kulay ng strawberry? <br />johnny: ube! <br /> <br />Q: anong klase ng damo ang ginagamit sa pantuhog ng lechon baboy? <br />A: APPLE!!! <br /> <br />MGA HIRIT-EDU <br />Kaninong telepono ang cannot b reached? kaninong pre-paid card ang paubos <br />na?" <br />Kaninong magulang ang gusto ng patayin ang TV? Kaninong mga kapatid ang <br />gusto ng mag iba ng apelyido? kaninong aso ang gusto ng maglayas?" <br />Sino sa inyo ang gagapang sa lusak? <br />Sino sa inyo ang pasan ang buong daigdig? <br />Sino sa inyo ang hindi sisikat at mananatili na lang "dakilang ekstra"? <br />Sino si Tonto ng the Lone Ranger? <br />Sino ang tinimbang ngunit kulang? <br />Sino ang madalas sa principal's office? <br />Kanino sa inyo hindi common ang common sense? <br />Sino ang pupulutin sa kangkungan pagkatapos ng show? <br />Sinong pumunta sa parlor para magpagupit pero kinulot?" <br />Sino ang umorder ng cheeseburger na walang cheese?" <br />Sino dito...ang dapat ipatuklaw...sa mga ahas ni zuma? <br />Sino dito... dapat ipa-piga...kay captain barbel... <br />Sino sa inyo...ang dapat lunurin...ni DYESEBEL... <br />Sino dito ang bumili ng sardinas.. pero ang lata, sarsa lang ang laman, <br />walang sardinas? <br />Sino ang may sandwich na ang palaman ay tinapay? <br />Sino sa inyo ang may bowling ball na dadalawa lang ang butas? <br />Sino ang upod na lapis sa inyo na dapat nang daanan ng eraser <br />Sino dito ang me queso de bola na cuadrado? <br />Sinong naubusan ng balat ng lechon nung christmas party? <br />Hindi ko man alam ang ibig sabihin, pero CHUVA CHUVA CHUK CHAK CHIENES ANG <br />GRUPONG 'TO! <br />BAHKEEEET?!?! Malaki ba ang mga problema niyo...o talagang insecure kayo sa <br />tisoy na <br />gameshow host?!?!?! <br />Sino sa inyo ang naglasing sa Mompo? <br /> <br />All time favorite: <br />Kaninong turon ang walang saging? <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106257753049068250?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1062577478721842272003-09-03T16:24:00.000+08:002003-09-03T16:24:38.690+08:00YABA Yet Another Bloody Acronym <br /> <br />-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <br /> <br />$0.02 Throwing in your two cents' worth <br />1FTR One for the road <br />24/7 24 hours a day, 7 days a week <br /> <br />A <br />A/S Age/Sex? <br />A/S/L Age/Sex/Location (or Language)? <br />AA Alcoholics Anonymous <br />AAA Travel club <br />AAAAA Travel club for alcoholics <br /> American Association Against Acronym Abuse <br />AAMOF As A Matter Of Fact <br />ACRONYM Abbreviated Coded Rendition Of Name Yielding Meaning <br />ADN Any Day Now <br />AFAIAA As Far As I Am Aware <br />AFAIC As Far As I'm Concerned <br />AFAICS As Far As I Can See <br />AFAIK As Far As I Know <br />AFAIR As Far As I Remember; As Far As I Recall <br />AFAIUI As Far As I Understand It <br />AFK Away From Keyboard <br />AIR As I Remember; As I Recall <br />AISB As I Said Before <br />AISI As I See It <br />AIW As It Were/Was <br />AKA Also Known As <br />AMAP As Much/Many As Possible <br />AMF Adios Mother F---er; Adios My Friend <br />ANFAWFOS And Now For A Word From Our Sponsor <br />APAC All Praise And Credit <br />APYR As Per Your Request <br />ASAFP As Soon As F---ing Possible <br />ASAP As Soon As Possible <br />ASCII American Standard Code of Information Interchange <br />ATB All The Best <br />ATEOTLYWBAT At The End Of This Lesson You Will Be Able To <br />ATLA Another Three Letter Acronym <br />ATM At The Moment / Automatic Teller Machine <br />ATTN Attention <br />ATTYOB Anything That Turns You On Baby <br />AWCIGO And Where Can I Get One <br />AWGTHTGTATA Are We Going To Have To Go Through ALL This Again? <br />AWGTHTGTTA Are We Going To Have To Go Through This Again? <br />AWHFY Are We Having Fun Yet? <br />AYT Are You There? <br /> <br />B <br />B/C BeCause (frequently just "b/c") <br />B3 Blah, Blah, Blah <br />B4 Before <br />B4N Bye for Now <br />BAC By Any Chance <br />BAD Broken As Designed <br />BAMF Bad Assed Mother F---er <br />BANANA Built Absolutely Nothing Anywhere Near Anybody <br />BB Be Back <br />BBFN Bye Bye For Now <br />BBIAB Be Back In A Bit <br />BBL Be Back Later <br />BBR Burnt Beyond Repair <br />BBS Bulletin Board System; Be Back Soon <br />BBW Big Beautiful Women <br />BC Basket Case <br />BCC Blind Carbon Copy <br />BCNU Be seein' you! (saying goodbye) <br />BEG Big Evil Grin <br />BF Boyfriend <br />BFD Big F---ing Deal <br />BFG Big Friendly Giant; Big F---ing Gun; Big F---ing Grin <br />BFH Big F---ing Hammer <br />BFI Brute Force and Ignorance; Bunch of F---ing Idiots <br />BFM Big F---ing Magic <br />BFMI Brute Force and Massive Ignorance <br />BFN Bye For Now <br />BFOG Blouse Full Of Goodies <br />BG Big Grin (as in <bg>) <br />BIC Best In Class <br />BICBW But I Could Be Wrong <br />BIL Brother In Law <br />BION Believe It Or Not <br />BIOYIOP Blow It Out Your I/O Port <br />BITD Beaten It To Death <br />BK Because <br />BKA Better Known As <br />BKAM Between Keyboard And Monitor (i.e., problem is with the user) <br />BMF Bad Mother F---er <br />BMOC Big Man On Campus <br />BMTIPG Brilliant Minds Think In Parallel Gutters <br />BNF Big Name Fan <br />BOC But Of Course <br />BOF Birds Of a Feather <br />BOFH Bastard [system] Operator From Hell <br />BOHICA Bend Over, Here It Comes Again! <br />BOL Best Of Luck <br />BOS Big Orange Switch <br />BOT Back On Topic <br />BOTE Back Of The Envelope <br />BOTEC Back Of The Envelope Calculation <br />BRB Be Right Back <br />BRS Big Red Switch <br />BS Bull S--- <br />BSEG Big S--- Eating Grin <br />BSG Broad Sweeping Generalization; Big Smiling Grin <br />BSOD Blue Screen Of Death <br />BTA But Then Again (in response to IOW) <br />BTAICBW But Then Again I could Be Wrong <br />BTAIM Be That As It May <br />BTDT Been There, Done That <br />BTDTGTTS Been There, Done That, Got The T-Shirt <br />BTLSOM Beats The Living S--- Out of Me <br />BTOBD Be There Or Be Dead <br />BTSOOM Beats The S--- Out Of Me <br />BTW By The Way <br />BUAF Butt Ugly ASCII Font <br />BUAG Butt Ugly ASCII Graphic <br />BWQ Buzz Word Quotient <br />BY BusY <br />BYKT But You Knew That <br />BYKTA But You Knew That Already <br />BYOB Bring Your Own Booze/Bottle <br /> <br />C <br />C/O in Care Of (for sending mail) <br />C/P/S City or Country / Profession / Status (married/single) <br />CADET Can't Add, Doesn't Even Try <br />CB Call Back <br />CC Carbon Copy; Courtesy Copy <br />CE Creative Editing <br />CF Charlie Foxtrot; Cluster F--- (meaning similar to SNAFU) <br />CFD Call For Discussion <br />CHOWUR see (C) HOW yoU aRe <br />CHUR see (C) How yoU aRe <br />CI$ Compu$erve Information Service (tm) <br />CIC Christ, I'm Confused <br />CIS Compuserve Information System (tm) <br />CIAO as in goodbye (said 'Chow') <br />CIO Cut It Out <br />CLAB Crying Like A Baby <br />CLOAKA Canonical List Of All Known Acronyms <br />CMIIW Correct Me If I'm Wrong <br />CO COnference <br />COB Close Of Business <br />COD Cash On Delivery (when receiving mail) <br />COTFLGOHAHA Crawling On The Floor Laughing Guts Out And Having A <br /> Heart Attack <br />CPF Can Pigs Fly? <br />CRAFT Can't Remember A F---ing Thing <br />CRPG Character (or computer) Role Playing Game <br />CRS Can't Remember S--- <br />CS Cop Shop (police station) <br />CTTD Cute Things They Do <br />CTTS Cute Things They Say <br />CU see (C) yoU <br />CUL see (C) yoU LateR <br />CUL8R see (C) yoU LateR (L8R) <br />CUL8TR see (C) yoU LaTeR (L8TR) <br />CWYL Chat With You Later <br />CYA Cover Your Ass; see (C) YA <br />CYL see (C) You Later <br /> <br />D <br />D&C "Duck and Cover" - a popular 1950's song in dedication <br /> to the atomic bomb (and its' possible attack) <br />D/L Download, transmit to you <br />DAP Parents Against Dyslexia <br />DBA Doing Business As <br />DBN Doing Business, NOT <br />DD Darling Daughter <br />DEU Dumb End User <br />DFU Don't Forget Units <br />DH Dear Hubby; Dumb Hubby; Deaf Hubby; DickHead <br />DIIK Damned If I Know <br />DIIN Damned If I kNow <br />DIL Daughter In Law <br />DILLIGAF Does It Look Like I Give A F---? <br />DILLIGAFF Do I Look Like I Give a Flying F---? <br />DINK Double Income, No Kids <br />DITUIHIBMSL? Did I tell you I hate IBMs lately? <br />DITUILIBMSL? Did I tell you I love IBMs lately? <br />DK Don't Know <br />DKU Drop Kick Ugly <br />DL Download, transmit to you <br />DLG Devilish Little Grin <br />DNA Did Not Answer <br />DNPM Darn Near P---ed Myself <br />DOA Dead On Arrival <br />DOB Date/Day Of Birth <br />DOM Dirty Old Man <br />DRA Don't Recognize Acronyms <br />DS Darling Son <br />DTA Don't Trust Anybody <br />DTD Document Type Definition <br />DTOKAB Drop To One Knee And Blow <br />DTP DeskTop Publishing <br />DTRT Do The Right Thing <br />DUCWIC Do You see (C) What I see (C) <br />DUK Dead Upon Keyboard <br />DWIM Do What I Mean <br />DWIMC Do What I Mean, Correctly <br />DWIMNWIS Do What I Mean, Not What I Say <br />DWKOTA Deep Wet Kiss On The Ass <br />DWKOTL Deep Wet Kiss On The Lips <br />DYE Damn Your Eyes! <br />DYHWIH Do You Hear What I Hear <br />DYSWIS Do You See What I See <br /> <br />E <br />E2EG Ear to Ear Grin <br />ED Emotionally Disturbed <br />EDP Emotionally Disturbed Person <br />EG Evil Grin; (for example, usually e.g.) <br />EGC Extrememly Gruntled Customer <br />EIF Exercise In Futility <br />EMS E-Mail Shorthand <br />EOB End Of Business <br />EOD End Of Discussion <br />EOF End Of File <br />EOL End Of Lecture <br />EOT End Of Thread (i.e., don't reply to this message) <br />ES&D Eat S--- & Die <br />ES&LTHI Eat Shit & Live To Hate It <br />ESAD Eat S--- And Die <br />ESAL Eat S--- And Live <br />ESBAM Eat S---, Bark At Moon <br />ESP ESPecially (frequently just "esp.") <br />ESOSL Endless Snorts of Stupid Laughter <br />ETA Estimated Time of Arrival <br />ETD Estimated Time of Departure <br />ETE Estimated Time En route <br />ETLA Extended Three Letter Acronym <br /> <br />F <br />F2F Face To Face <br />FA F--- All (nothing) <br />FAQ Frequently Asked Question <br />FCFS First Come, First Served <br />FCOL For Crying Out Loud <br />FDROTFL Falling Down Rolling On The Floor Laughing <br />FFRD Flying F--- in a Rolling Donut (I don't give a....) <br />FFS For F---s Sake <br />FHFHFH F--- Him, Feed Him FishHeads <br />FICCL Frankly, I Couldn't Care Less <br />FIGJAM F--- I'm Good, Just Ask Me <br />FIGMO F--- It, Got My Orders <br />FIIK F---ed If I Know! <br />FIIN F---ed If I kNow! <br />FIL Father In Law <br />FIOFYF Figure It Out For Yourself, F---er <br />FISH First In, Still Here <br />FISHDO F--- It, S--- Happens, Drive On <br />FITB Fill In The Blank <br />FKMFATIFKYB French Kiss My Furry Ass 'Til It French Kisses You Back! <br />FLK Funny Looking Kid <br />FMH F--- Me Harder (usually an exclamation of disgust) <br />FMTEYEWTK Far More Than Everything You've Ever Wanted To Know <br />FNI F---ing Not Involved <br />FotR Fellowship of the Rings (a Tolkien work) <br />FOAD F--- Off And Die <br />FOAF Friend Of A Friend <br />FOAFOAG Father Of A Friend Of A Girlfriend <br />FOAG Father Of A Girlfriend <br />FOCLMAO Fell Off Chair Laughin My Ass Off <br />FOD Finger Of Death <br />FOOBAR Variant of FUBAR <br />FOR For Obvious Reasons <br />FOS Freedom Of Speech; Full Of S--- <br />FOT Full Of Tripe <br />FOTCL Falling Off The Chair Laughing <br />FRE Frequently Requested Enhancement <br />FRED F---ing Ridiculous Electronic Device <br />FRZ Fruitin' Religious Zealot <br />FTASB Faster Than A Speeding Bullet <br />FTDS F--- The Dumb S--- <br />FTF Face To Face <br />FTL Faster Than Light <br />FTP File Transfer Protocol <br />FTS Fixin' To Start <br />FUBAB F---ed Up Beyond All Belief <br />FUBAR F---ed Up Beyond All Repair/Recognition <br />FUD Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt <br />FUMTU F---ed Up More Than Usual <br />FURTB Full Up Ready To Burst (about hard disk drives!) <br />FWIW For What It's Worth <br />FWMAYOR F--- With Me At Your Own Risk <br />FY&TSYRIO F--- You & The Sysop You Rode In On <br />FYA For Your Amusement <br />FYDITM F--- You Directly In The Mouth <br />FYI For Your Information <br /> <br />G <br />G2G Got to Go <br />G Grin (as in <g>) <br />GA Go Ahead <br />GAC Get A Clue <br />GAFIA Get Away From It All (as in drop out of ILink for a bit) <br />GAFM Get Away From Me <br />GAL Get A Life <br />GBH&K Great Big Hugs & Kisses <br />GBH&KB Greak Big Hugs & Kisses Back <br />GBTM Get Back To Me <br />GBY God Bless You <br />GC Garbage Collect (tidy up) <br />GD&H Grinning, Ducking & Hiding <br />GD&R Grinning, Ducking & Running <br />GD&RF Grinning, Ducking & Running Fast! <br />GD&RVVF Grinning, Ducking & Running Very Very Fast! <br />GD&W Grinning, Ducking & Weaving <br />GF Girlfriend <br />GFR Grim File Reaper (pervasive data destroyer) <br />GFU General F--- Up <br />GFY Go F--- Yourself <br />GGC Goo Goo Cluster (cause zits & intestinal blockage) <br />GGG GiGGle (as in <ggg>) <br />GGN Gotta Go Now <br />GH Getting Hard (male) <br />GIGO Garbage In, Garbage Out; Garbage In, Gospel Out <br /> (people accepting blindly what the computer says) <br />GIWIST Gee, I Wish I'd Said That <br />GKW God Knows What <br />GLG Goofy Little Grin <br />GLGH Good Luck and Good Hunting <br />GM Got Milk? <br />GMT Greenwich Mean Time <br />GMTA Great Minds Think Alike <br />GOK God Only Knows <br />GOOML Get Out Of My Life <br />GOTFIA Groaning On The Floor In Agony <br />GOWI Get On With It <br />GPF General Protection Fault; Go Puke, Fast! <br />GRUIT Get Real yoU Impudent Thing <br />GSHIWMP Giggling So Hard I Wet My Pants <br />GTABO Get That Ass Back On (in response to ROFLMAO) <br />GTBOS Glad To Be Of Service <br />GTFOOMF Get The F--- Out Of My Face <br />GTG Got To Go <br />GTP Gone To Pee <br />GW Getting Wet (female) <br />GWATCDR God Willing And The Creek Don't Rise <br /> <br />H <br />H2 How To <br />HAND Have A Nice Day <br />HAK Hugs And Kisses <br />HCB Holy Cow, Batman! <br />HHGTTG HitchHiker's Guide To The Galaxy <br />HHO 1/2 K Ha Ha Only Half Kidding <br />HHOJ Ha Ha Only Joking <br />HHOK Ha Ha Only Kidding <br />HHOS Ha Ha Only Serious <br />HIB_ Have I Been ______? <br />HIRTA HereInafter Referred To As <br />HLV Hasta La Vista <br />HLVB Hasta La Vista, Baby <br />HMFIC Head Mother F---er In Charge <br />HMFWRIC Head Mother F---er What aRe In Charge <br />HOMPR Hang On, Mobile Phones' Ringing <br />HP Home Page <br />HSIK How Should I Know <br />HSP Highly Sensitive Person <br />HTB Heavens To Betsy <br />HTFSIK How The F--- Should I Know <br />HTH Hope This Helps! <br />HTML Hyper Text Markup Language <br />HUA Head Up Ass <br />HUF Horny Unattached Female <br />HUM Horny Unattached Male <br />HW HardWare <br />HWUA Head Way Up Ass <br />HWS(PEST) Husband Wants Sex (Please Excuse Slow Typing) <br /> <br />I <br />IAAA I Am An Accountant <br />IAAL I Am A Lawyer <br />IAC In Any Case <br />IAE In Any Event <br />IANAA I Am Not An Accountant <br />IANAC I Am Not A Crook <br />IANAL I Am Not A Lawyer <br />IANALBIPOOTV I Am Not A Lawyer, But I Play One On TV <br />IANYM In A New York Minute <br />IARTPFWTSIOWIM I Am Repeating This Parrot-Fashion Without The <br /> Slightest Idea Of What It Means. <br />IASH I Am So Horny <br />IAWTP I Agree With This Post <br />IBB I'll Be Back <br />IBC Inadequate, But Cute <br />IBM Inadequate, but Marketable <br />IC I see (C) <br />ICB I Care Because? <br />ICBM InterContinental Ballistic Missile <br />ICIHICPCL I Can't Imagine How I Could Possibly Care Less <br />ICTYBTIHTKY I Could Tell You But Then I'd Have To Kill You <br />ICUR I see (C) You Are <br />IDD InDeeD <br />IDGAD I Don't Give A Damn <br />IDGAS I Don't Give A S--- <br />IDGI I Don't Get It <br />IDK I Don't Know <br />IDTS I Don't Think So <br />IDTT I'll Drink To That! <br />IE that is (normally i.e.) <br />IHATCFYB I Have A Terrible Craving For Your Body! <br />IHTBS It Has To Be Shown <br />IHTFP I Hate This F---ing Place; I Have Truly Found Paradise <br />IIABDFI If It Ain't Broke, Don't Fix It <br />IINM If I'm Not Mistaken <br />IIRC If I Recall/Remember Correctly <br />IITYWIMIWHTKY If I Tell You What It Means, I Will Have To Kill You <br />IITYWIMWYBMAD If I Tell You What It Means, Will You Buy Me A Drink? <br />IITYWTMWYKM If I Tell You What This Means Will You Kiss Me? <br />IITYWYBAD If I Tell You, Will You Buy Another Drink? <br />IITYWYBMAB If I Tell You, Will You Buy Me A Beer? <br />IJLS I Just Like Saying <br />IK I Know <br />ILI I Like Ike <br />ILICISCOMK I Laughed, I Cried, I Spat Coffee/Coke/Cadmium On My Keyboard <br />ILIWTPCT I Love It When The Plan Comes Together. <br />ILN It's Looking Nice / It Looks Nice <br />ILS Imaginary Lat Syndrome <br />ILSHIBAMF I Laughed So Hard I Broke All My Furniture! <br />ILU I Love yoU <br />ILY I Love You <br />IMAO In My Arrogant Opinion <br />IMBO In My Biased Opinion <br />IMCDO In My Conceited Dogmatic Opinion <br />IMCO In My Considered Opinion <br />IME In My Experience <br />IMHO In My Humble Opinion <br />IMMOR I Make My Own Rules <br />IMMSMC If My Memory Serves Me Correctly <br />IMNSHO In My Not So Humble Opinion <br />IMNSVHO In My Not So Very Humble Opinion <br />IMO In My Opinion <br />IMOBO In My Own Biased Opinion <br />IMPOV In My Point Of View <br />IMS I Must Say <br />IMU I Miss yoU <br />IMVHO In My Very Humble Opinion <br />INGSI I'm Not Gonna Say It <br />INPO In No Particular Order <br />INT I'll Never Tell <br />IOU I Owe yoU <br />IOW In Other Words <br />IRL In Real Life <br />IROOC I've Run Out Of Cigarettes <br />ISAGN I See A Great Need <br />ISO In Search Of; International Organization for Standardization; <br /> Organisation Internationale de Normalisation <br />ISP Internet Service Provider <br />ISTM It Seems To Me <br />ISTR I Seem To Remember <br />ITAH Is There Anybody Here <br />ITFA In The Final Analysis <br />IUTHALORFH I Used To Have A Lot Of Respect For Him/Her <br />ITYM I Think You Mean <br />IUTKATS I Used To Know All That Stuff <br />IWBNI It Would Be Nice If <br />IWIK I Wish I Knew <br />IWSN I Want Sex Now <br />IYFEG Insert Your Favorite Ethnic Group <br />IYKWIM If You Know What I Mean <br />IYKWIMAITYD If You Know What I Mean And I Think You Do <br />IYSWIM If You See What I Mean <br />IYW If You Wish <br /> <br />J <br />J/K Just Kidding <br />JAFO Just Another F---ing Observer <br />JAFU Just Another F--- Up <br />JAM Just A Moment; Just A Minute <br />JANFU Joint Army-Navy F--- Up. (When American troops get <br /> shelled by their own side, in this case involving <br /> both the army and the navy.) <br />JAS Just A Second <br />JAWS Just Another Windows Shell <br />JFF Just For Fun <br />JFYI Just For Your Information <br />JIC Just In Case <br />JMOOC Just My Opinion Of Course <br />JMHFOOC Just My Humble F---ing Opinion Of Course <br />JPW Just Plain Weird <br />JSNM Just Stark Naked Magic <br />JTYWTK Just Thought You Wanted To Know <br /> <br />K <br />K oKay <br />KCBIWIYWI Keep Coming Back, It Works If You Work It <br />KDW Keep Digging, Watson (reply to NSS) <br />KEAH Kill Everyone After Hours <br />KIBO Knowledge In, Bulls--- Out <br />KISS Keep It Simple Stupid <br />KITA Kick In The Ass (type of therapy) <br />KMA Kiss My Ass <br />KMYF Kiss Me You Fool <br />KOTC Kiss On The Cheek <br />KOTL Kiss On The Lips <br />KTCOOTN Keep This Crap Out Of This Newsgroup <br />KUTGW Keep Up The Good Work <br />KWIM Know What I Mean? <br />KYHOOYA Keep Your Head Out Of Your Ass <br /> <br />L <br />L8R Later <br />LAB&TYD Life's A Bitch & Then You Die <br />LAGNAF Let's All Get Naked And F--- <br />LART Luser Attitude Re-adjustment Tool [Clue by four] <br />LIFER Lazy Incompetent F---er Evading Responsibility <br />LJBF Let's Just Be Friends <br />LLTA Lots and Lots of Thunderous/Thundering Applause <br />LMA Leave Me Alone <br />LMAO Laughing My Ass Off <br />LMAOROTF Laughing My Ass Off Rolling On The Floor <br />LMC Lost My Connection <br />LMCOA Lost My Connection Once Again <br />LMFAO Laughing My F---ing Ass Off <br />LMK Let Me Know <br />LMTFA Leave Me The F--- Alone <br />LMWIS Lick Me Where I Sweat <br />LotR Lord of the Rings (a Tolkien work) <br />LOA List Of Acronyms/Abbreviations <br />LOHICA Look Out, Here It Comes Again (military term) <br />LOI Lack Of Interest <br />LOL Laughing Out Loud; Little Old Lady <br />LOLAROTG Laughing Out Loud And Rolling On The Ground <br />LOMBARD Lots Of Money But A Real Dickhead <br />LSFIAB Like Shooting Fish In A Barrel <br />LSHIPMP Laughing So Hard I Peed My Pants <br />LSP Less Sensitive Person <br />LTBF Learn To Be Funny <br />LTIP Laughing Til I Puke <br />LTMSH Laughing 'Til My sides Hurt <br />LTNS Long Time, No See <br />LTUAE Life, The Universe, And Everything (3rd part of THHGTTG) <br />LULU Locally Unwanted Land Use <br />LUSER Loser USER <br />LZ Loser! <br /> <br />M <br />M$ Micro$oft <br />MARINE My Ass Riding In Navy Equipment <br />MAY Mad About You <br />MAYB Mad About You, Baby <br />MBUC Mind Bogglingly Unlikely Coincidence <br />MCIBTY(SN) My Computer Is Better Than Yours (So Nyerrr) <br />MD More Dirt (Physician) <br />MEGO My Eyes Glaze Over <br />MFG More Friendly Garbage! <br />MFIC Mother F---er In Charge <br />MFWIC Mother F---er What's In Charge <br />MGD My Gameboy Died <br />MH Mostly Harmless (5th part of THHGTTG) <br />MHDC(A) My Hard Drive crashed (again) <br />MIL Mother In Law <br />MILG Make It Look Good <br />MIPS Meaningless Information Per Second <br />ML More Later <br />MLA Multiple Letter Acronym <br />MMIF My Mouth Is Full <br />MOF Matter Of Fact <br />MOR Middle Of the Road <br />MORF Male Or Female <br />MOS Member of the Opposite Sex <br />MOTAS Member Of The Appropriate Sex <br />MOTD Message Of The Day <br />MOTH Humorous Collectibles Forum variation on Member of the Month <br />MOTM Member Of The Month <br />MOTOS Member Of The Opposite Sex <br />MOTSS Member Of The Same Sex <br />MS More S---; More of the Same; (Masters Degree) <br />MSCEA My Southern Comforts' Empty Again <br />MSS Member of the Same Sex <br />MTFBWY May The Force Be With You <br />MUD Multi User Domain (or Dungeon) <br />MUF Material Unaccounted For <br />MUNG Mash/Mung Until No Good <br />MYOB Mind Your Own Business <br /> <br />N <br />NAGI Not A Good Idea <br />NAHM Not A Happy Man <br />NAHW Not A Happy Woman <br />NAVY Never Again Volunteer Yourself <br />NB Nota Bene (note well) <br />NBD No Big Deal <br />NBL Not Bloody Likely <br />NBTD Nothing Better To Do <br />NERD National Establishment for Real Dorks <br />NFG No F---ing Good <br />NFI No F---ing Idea <br />NFIAA No F---ing Idea At All <br />NFW No F---ing Way <br />NFY No F--- You <br />NG News Group <br />NHOH Never Heard Of Him/Her <br />NIAA No Idea At All <br />NICBDAT Nothing Is Certain But Death And Taxes <br />NIDWTC No I Don't Want To Chat <br />NIH Not Invented Here <br />NIMBY Not In My Back Yard <br />NIMFYE Not In My Front Yard Either <br />NINO Nothing In, Nothing Out <br />NIMTO Not In My Term of Office <br />NIT Not In Therapy <br />NLI Not Logged In <br />NM NeverMind <br />NMI No Middle Initial <br />NN Night-Night <br />NOPE Not On Planet Earth <br />NORWICH kNickers Off Ready When I Come Home <br />NOYB None Of Your Business <br />NP No Problem <br />NPF No Problem Found <br />NPLU Not People Like Us <br />NQA No Questions Asked <br />NQOS Not Quite Our Sort <br />NRN No Reply Necessary <br />NSS No S---, Shylock/Sherlock <br />NTG Not Too Good <br />NTH No Therapy Helpful <br />NTIBOA Not That I'm Bitter Or Anything <br />NTIM Not That It Matters <br />NTIMM Not That It Matters Much <br />NTL NeverTheLess / NoneTheLess <br />NUI Network User Identification <br />NYM New York Minute <br />NYP Not Your Problem <br /> <br />O <br />O Over (to you) <br />OATUS On A Totally Unrelated Subject <br />OAUS On An Unrelated Subject <br />OB Obligatory (frequently Ob) <br />OBTW Oh, By the Way <br />OD OverDose; Oh Dear <br />OFO Out F---ing Off <br />OFS One Finger Salute <br />OIC Oh, I see (C) <br />OMFG Oh My F---ing God! <br />OMG Oh My God! <br />ONNA Oh No, Not Again <br />ONNTA Oh No, Not This Again <br />OO Over and Out <br />OOSOOM Out Of Sight, Out Of Mind <br />OOTB Out Of The Box <br />OOTC Obligatory On Topic Comment <br />OPL Obvious Panty Line <br />OPM Other People's Money <br />OPP Other People's Problems <br />OSIF Oh S---, I Forgot! <br />OSIM Oh Shoot It's Monday <br />OSU Officially Sanctioned User <br />OT Off Topic <br />OT1H On The One Hand <br />OTBE Over Taken By Events (orig. military) <br />OTC Over The Counter <br />OTD Out The Door <br />OTF On The Floor <br />OTK Over The Knee <br />OTL Out To Lunch <br />OTOH On The Other Hand; On The One Hand <br />OTOOH On The Other Other Hand <br />OTT Over The Top <br />OTTH On The Third Hand <br />OTTOMH Off The Top Of My Head <br />OTTOMHAROO Off the Top of My Head and Rolling Out of Bounds <br />OTW On The Whole <br />OW Oh Well <br />OWTTE Or Words To That Effect <br /> <br />P <br />PABG Pack A Big Gun <br />PBD Programmer Brain Damage <br />PBM Play By Mail (games) <br />PCB Please Call Back <br />PCMCIA People Can't Master/Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms; <br /> Personal Computer Memory Card International Association <br />PCO Please Carry On <br />PCYLIHOONL Please Cross Your Legs, I Have Only One Nail Left <br />PD Public Domain <br />PDA Public Display of Affection <br />PDN Public Data Network <br />PDQ Pretty Damn Quick <br />PEBCAK Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard <br />PF&HOMW Printed, Framed & Hanging On My Wall <br />PFM Pure F---ing Magic <br />PGY Post Graduate Year (as in PGY-1, PGY-2 etc. used in PGY Med) <br />PHB Pointy Haired Boss (from Dilbert, i.e., doesn't have a clue) <br />PhD Piled Higher and Deeper. <br />PHD Push Here Dummy (type of automatic camera) <br />PIMP Pee In My Pants (often in combination) <br />PITA Pain In The Ass <br />PITBY Put It in Their Back Yard <br />PKB Pot, Kettle, Black! <br />PLBKAC Problem Lies Between Keyboard And Chair <br />PLMKO Please Let Me Know, Ok? <br />PLOKTA Press Lots Of Keys To Abort <br />PLONK Please Leave Our Newsgroup, Killfiled! <br />PMBI Pardon My Butting In <br />PMETC Pardon Me ETC. <br />PMFBI Pardon Me For Butting In <br />PMFJI Pardon Me For Jumping In <br />PMFJIH Pardon Me For Jumping In Here. <br />PMJI Pardon My Jumping In <br />PMYMHMMFSWGAD Pardon Me, You Must Have Mistaken Me For Someone <br /> Who Gives A Damn <br />PMYMHMMFSWGAS Pardon Me, You Must Have Mistaken Me For Someone Who <br /> Gives A S---. <br />POC Prisoner Of Chat; Peeping Other Chatters <br />POETS Piss On Everything, Tomorrow's Saturday; Piss Off Early, <br /> Tomorrow's Saturday <br />POITS Piss On It Tomorrow's Saturday <br />POM Phase Of the Moon <br />POME Prisoner Of Mother England <br />POP Point Of Presence; Post Office Protocol <br />POS Piece Of S---; Person Over Shoulder <br />POSSLQ Person of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters <br />POQ Piss Off Quickly <br />POQADCB Piss Off Quickly and Don't Come Back! <br />POV Point Of View <br />PPL PeoPLe <br />PPN Programmer Project Number (currently known as UserID) <br />PPOSTFU Post Proof Or Shut The F--- Up <br />PPP Petty Pet Peeve; Point to Point Protocol <br />PPPP Previous Paragraph was Polemical Position <br />PS Post Scriptum; PostScript <br />PT Physical Training <br />PTB Powers That Be <br />PTM Please Tell Me <br />PTO Patent and Trademark Office (US Govt); Please Turn Over <br />PUNTS People of Utterly No Tactical Significance (military term) <br />PW Pathetic Wanker; PowWow <br />PYS Pack Your Stuff <br /> <br />Q <br />QED Quod Erat Demonstrandum; Quite Easily Done <br />QT QuieT (also q.t., Q&T, or as a phrase "on the q.t.") <br /> <br />R <br />RA Research Assistant; Resident Assistant <br />RAK Random Act of Kindness <br />RBS Really Big Screen <br />RE REgarding <br />REMF Rear Echelon Mother F---ers (eg, clueless micromanaging bosses) <br />RFC Request For Comments <br />RFD Request For Discussion <br />RFT Request For Thinking <br />RHIP Rank Has Its Privileges <br />RL Real Life <br />RLCO Real Life COnference <br />RNA Ring, No Answer <br />ROFFNAR Rolling On the Floor For No Apparent Reason <br />ROFL Rolling On the Floor Laughing <br />ROFLAHMSL Rolling On the Floor Laughing And Holding My Sides Laughing <br />ROFLASC Rolling On the Floor Laughing And Scaring the Cat <br />ROFLASTC Rolling On the Floor Laughing And Scaring The Cat <br />ROFLGO Rolling On Floor Laughing Guts Out! <br />ROFLMAO Rolling On the Floor Laughing My ASCII Off <br />ROFLMAOOL Rolling On the Floor Lauging My Ass Off Out Loud <br />ROFLOL Rolling On the Floor Laughing Out Loud <br />ROFLOLVH Rolling On the Floor Laughing Out Loud Very Hard <br />ROFLWMK Rolling On the Floor Laughing -- Wet My Knickers <br />ROFPML Roll On Floor Pissing Myself Laughing. <br />ROFTTPOF Rolling On the Floor Trying To Put Out Flames <br />RotK Return of the King (a Tolkien work) <br />ROTBA Reality On The Blink Again <br />ROTF Rolling On The Floor <br />ROTFL Rolling On The Floor Laughing <br />ROTFLAHMS Rolling On The Floor Laughing And Holding My Side <br />ROTFLMAAOBPO Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass And Other Body Parts Off <br />ROTFLMAO Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass Off <br />ROTFSTCLMAAOBPO Rolling On The Floor Scaring The Cat Laughing My Ass <br /> And Other Body Parts Off <br />ROTM Right On The Money <br />RPG Role Playing Games <br />RSN Real Soon Now <br />RSVP Repondez S'il Vous Plait (French, "please reply") <br />RT Real Time <br />RTFI Read The F---ing Instructions <br />RTFM Read The F---ing Manual <br />RTFQ Read The F---ing Question <br />RTFS Read The F---ing Source <br />RTFMS Read The F---ing Manual, Sir (from the military) <br />RTI Real Time Interruption <br />RTS Read The Screen <br />RUMF aRe yoU Male or Female? <br /> <br />S <br />S/O SomeOne (frequently just "s/o") <br />S/TH SomeTHing (frequently just "s/th") <br />S2BX Soon To Be eX <br />SAMF Sad Ass Mother F---er <br />SAMFU Self-Adjusting Military F--- Up <br />SAMFUTU Situation Abnormal, More F---ed Up Than Usual <br />SAPFU Surpassing All Previous F--- Ups <br />SAR Smart Ass Remark <br />SAYOR Speak At Your Own Risk <br />SBB Stupid Beyond Belief <br />SBCN Sitting Behind the Computer, Naked <br />SBD Silent But Deadly <br />SBID S---ty But It'll Do <br />SCNR Sorry, Could Not Resist <br />SDIHTT SomeDay I'll Have The Time <br />SEC SECond, eg. Wait a sec <br />SEG S--- Eating Grin <br />SEP Somebody Else's Problem <br />SFLA Stupid Four Letter Acronym <br />SFT Sorry For That <br />SGML Standardized General Markup Language <br />SH S--- Happens <br />SHLH Sitting Here Lauging Hysterically <br />SHTS Spit Hitting The Spam <br />SHTSI Somebody Had To Say It <br />SICS Sitting In Chair Snickering <br />SIG Special Interest Group <br />SIIN Stuffed If I Know! <br />SIL Son In Law; Sister In Law <br />SITD Still In The Dark <br />SLATFATF So Long, And Thanks For All The Fish (4th part of THHGTTG) <br />SLIP Single Line In Protocol; Serial Line Internet Protocol <br />SLJ S---ty Little Job <br />SLJO S---ty Little Job Officer <br />SMAR Suck My Ass Raw <br />SMMWO Shut My Mouth Wide Open <br />SMO Serious Mode On <br />SMOF Secret Master(s) Of Fandom <br />SMOP Small Matter Of Programming <br />SMOFF Serious Mode OFF <br />SMTP Simple Mail Transfer Protocol <br />SNAC Sitting Naked At Computer <br />SNAFU Situation Normal: All F---ed Up <br />SNAG Sensitive New Age Guy <br />SNERT Snot-Nosed Egotistical Rude Teenager <br />SNFIAA Still No F---ing Idea At All <br />SNR Signal to Noise Ratio <br />SO Significant Other <br />SOI Stink On Ice <br />SOL S--- Out of Luck <br />SOP Standing Operational Procedures; Standard Operating Procedure <br />SOS Same Old S--- <br />SOSO Same Old, Same-Old <br />SOVS SomeOne Very Special <br />SPAM SPiced hAM (Hormel's canned meat) <br />SSDD Same S---, Different Day <br />SSIA Subject Says It All <br />ST Star Trek; Such That (frequently just "s.t.") <br />ST-DS9 Star Trek, Deep Space 9 <br />ST-TNG Star Trek, The Next Generation <br />ST-TOS Star Trek, The Original Series <br />ST-VOY Star Trek, Voyager <br />STBY Sucks To Be You <br />STFU Shut The F--- Up <br />STIFF "Stiff", said loudly. <br />STI / ST-TMP Star Trek, first movie / The Motion Picture <br />STII / ST-WOK Star Trek, second movie / 'Wrath Of Khan' <br />STIII / ST-SFS Star Trek, third movie / 'Search For Spock' <br />STIV / ST-TVH Star Trek, fourth movie / 'The Voyage Home' <br />STS So To Speak <br />STV / ST-TFF Star Trek, fifth movie / 'The Final Frontier' <br />STVI / ST-TUC Star Trek, sixth movie / 'The Undiscovered Country' <br />SUCDIC Situation Under Control, Dickheads In Charge <br />SUFID Screwing Up Face In Disgust <br />SUNOILTY Shut Up, No One Is Listening To You <br />SUSFU Situation Unchanged, Still F---ed Up <br />SUYP Shut Up You Pervert <br />SW SoftWare; So What?; Says Whom?; StarWars <br />SW-SE StarWars Special Edition <br />SWAG Simple Wild Ass Guess; Scientific Wild Ass Guess <br />SWAK Sealed With A Kiss <br />SWALK Sealed With A Loving Kiss <br />SWDYRTW Since When Do You Rule The Web? <br />SWMBO She Who Must Be Obeyed <br />SWYP So What's Your Problem? <br />SYSOP SYStem OPerator <br />SYT Sweet Young Thing <br /> <br />T <br />TA Teaching Assistant <br />TAF That's All, Folks! <br />TAFN That's All For Now <br />TANJ There Ain't No Justice <br />TANSTAAFL There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch <br />TARFU Things Are Really F---ed Up <br />TBC To Be Continued <br />TBE To Be Expected <br />TBH To Be Honest <br />TBYB Try Before You Buy <br />TC Telephone Call; Take Care <br />TCB Taking Care of Business <br />TCBY Taking Care of Business, Ya'll <br />TCD The Cat's Dead <br />TDD The Dog's Dead <br />TDM Too Damn Many <br />TEOTWAWKI The End Of The World As We Know It <br />TFB Too F---ing Bad <br />TFE Too F---ing Easy <br />TFM The F---ing Manual <br />TFS Three Finger Salute (Ctrl-Alt-Del) <br />TFTT Thanks For The Thought <br />TGAL Think Globally, Act Locally <br />TGIF Thank God Its Friday <br />TGTF Thank God Tomorrow's Friday <br />THHGTTG The HitchHiker's Guide To The Galaxy <br />THO Titty Hard On <br />TIA Thanks In Advance <br />TIATLG Truly, I Am The Living God <br />TIC Tongue In Cheek <br />TIE Take It Easy <br />TIME Tears In My Eyes (often in combination) <br />TIMTOWTDI There Is More Than One Way To Do It <br />TINALO This Is Not A Legal Opinion <br />TINAR This Is Not A Recommendation <br />TINC There Is No Cabal <br />TINSTAAFL There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch <br />TINWIS That Is Not What I Said <br />TIWTGLGG This Is Where The Goofy Little Grin Goes <br />TIP To Insure Promptness <br />TJATAW Truth, Justice, And The American Way <br />TLA Three Letter Acronym <br />TLC Tender Loving Care <br />TLG The Living God <br />TM Thread Mangler <br />TMI Too Much Information <br />TMIKTLIU The More I Know, The Less I Understand <br />TMTC Too Many To Count <br />TN TelNet <br />TNOTVS There's Nothing On Television, So ... <br />TNSO Temptingly Naked Significant Other <br />TNX Thanks (as in ThaNX) <br />TPAE The Possibilities Are Endless <br />TPS(S) This Program Sucks (Severely) <br />TPTB The Powers That Be <br />TQM Total Quality Management <br />TRATEOTU The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe (2nd part of THHGTTG) <br />TRDMC Tears Running Down My Cheeks <br />TS Tough S--- <br />TSOHF Total Sense Of Humour Failure <br />TSJD Texas Size Jelly Donut - official food of Texas sysops <br />TSR Terminate and Stay Resident program; Totally Stupid Rules <br />TT Two Towers, The (a Tolkien work) <br />TTBE That's To Be Expected <br />TTBOMK To The Best Of My Knowledge <br />TTFN Ta-Ta For Now <br />TTL4N That's The Lot For Now <br />TTM To The Moderator <br />TTS Tiny Tit Syndrome <br />TTUL Talk (or Type) To you Later <br />TTYL Talk To You Later <br />TTYS Talk To You Soon <br />TTYRS Talk To You Real Soon? <br />TUFD The User File Died <br />TWAIN Technology Without An Interesting Name <br />TWIMC To Whom It May Concern <br />TWYAS That's What You All Say <br />TWYT That's What You Think <br />TYLE Took You Long Enough <br />TYVL, YWEL Thank You Very Little, You're Welcome Even Less <br />TYVM Thank You Very Much <br /> <br />U <br />U/L Upload, send to the BBS <br />UAE Unrecoverable Application Error (Bane of Windows' users!) <br />UBD User Brain Damage <br />UDS Ugly Domestic Scene <br />UL Upload, send to the BBS <br />UOK yoU OK? <br />UNA Use No Acronyms <br />UNCLE Unified Nuclear Coalition of Latvian Emigrants <br />URLCM yoU aRe weLCoMe <br />USU USUally (frequently just "usu.") <br />UTC Under The Counter; Coordinated Universal Time; <br /> Temps Universel Coordonnie <br />UTT Under The Table <br /> <br />V <br />VBEG Very Big Evil Grin (as in <vbeg>) <br />VBG Very Big Grin (as in <vbg>) <br />VBSEG Very Big S--- Eating Grin (as in <vbseg>) <br />VETLA Very Enhanced TLA <br />VH Virtual Hug <br />VPH Visible Panty Line <br />VR Virtual Reality <br />VT Virtual Time <br /> <br />W <br />W/ With (frequently just "w/") <br />W/O WithOut (frequently just "w/o") <br />W8 Wait <br />W8ING WaitING <br />WAB? What, Another Bill? <br />WADR With All Due Respect <br />WAEF When All Else Fails <br />WAFWOT What A F---ing Waste Of Time <br />WAG Wild-Assed Guess <br />WALOC What A Load of Crap <br />WAMKSAM Why Are My Kids (or Kitties) Staring At Me? <br />WB Welcome Back <br />WCAGA What Comes Around, Goes Around <br />WCTYBTWHTKY We Could Tell You, But Then We'd Have To Kill You <br />WDF What Da F---? <br />WDYMBT What Do (or Did) You Mean By That? <br />WEFT Wrong Every F---ing Time <br />WFHIT What Fresh Hell Is This? (from the writings of Dorothy Parker) <br />WFM Works For Me <br />WFO Wide Full (or F---ing) Open <br />WGAS Who Gives A S--- <br />WIBAMU Well I'll Be A Monkey's Uncle <br />WIBNIF Wouldn't If Be Nice IF... <br />WIGAC When I Get A Chance <br />WIMP Windows, Icons, Mouse, Pointing <br />WIZOP Wizard Sysop (the primary forum administrator for a forum) <br />WMMOWS Wash My Mouth Out With Soap <br />WOA Work Of Art <br />WOFTAM Waste Of Flaming Time And Money <br />WOLF Witless One Line Followup <br />WOM Word Of Mouth <br />WOMBAT Waste Of Money, Brains, And Time <br />WOWF Witless One Word Followup <br />WRATGAS Who Really And Truly Gives A S--- <br />WRT With Regard To; With Respect To <br />WSD Willing Suspension of Disbelief (e.g. when watching movies) <br />WTF What The F--- <br />WTFDIC What The F--- Do I Care <br />WTFDIK What The F--- Do I Know <br />WTFDYTYA Who The F--- Do You Think You Are <br />WTFIIWT_A What The F--- Is It With These _____ Anyway? <br />WTFO What The F---, Over (Reply) <br />WTFWT "What the F--- Was That?" - Mayor of Hiroshima <br />WTG Way To Go <br />WTH What The Hell (or Heck) <br />WTMKF Welcome To My Kill Filter <br />WUGAC When yoU Get A Chance <br />WWS Wife Wants Sex (please wait a tic) <br />WWW World Wide Web; World Wide Waste; World Wide Waiting; <br /> World Wild Web <br />WYBMADIITY Will You Buy Me A Double If I Tell You? <br />WYLABOCTGWTR Would You Like A Bowl Of Cream To Go With That Remark? <br />WYLASOMWTC Would You Like A Saucer Of Milk With That Comment? <br />WYGAC When You Get A Chance <br />WYGIWYG What You Got Is What You Get <br />WYGIWYPF What You Get Is What You Pay For <br />WYP What's Your Point? <br />WYSBANRTWYG What You See Bears Absolutely No Relation To What You Get <br />WYSINEWYGBIC What You See Is Not Exactly What You Get But It's Close <br />WYSBYGI What You See Before You Get It <br />WYSIWYG What You See Is What You Get <br />WYSOH Where's Your Sense Of Humor? <br />WYTYSYDG What You Thought You Saw, You Didn't Get <br /> <br />X <br />XYZ eXamine Your Zipper <br /> <br />Y <br />Y2K Year 2000 (2000 = 2K) <br />Y3 Yadda Yadda Yadda <br />Y6B whY 6 Billion? (ie, overpopulation is more dangerous than Y2K) <br />YABA Yet Another Bloody Acronym <br />YAC are You Available to Chat? <br />YADS Yet Another DOS Shell <br />YAFA Yet Another "Fine" Acronym <br />YAFIYGI You Asked For It, You Got It <br />YANETUT You Are Not Expected To Understand This <br />YAOTM Yet Another Off-Topic Message <br />YAP Yet Another Ploy <br />YBYSA You Bet Your Sweet Ass <br />YCDBSOYA You Can't Do Business Sitting On Your Ass! <br />YCDBWYCID You Can't Do Business When Your Computer Is Down! <br />YCLIU You Can Look It Up <br />YGTBK You've Got To Be Kidding <br />YGTBDSM You've Got To Be Dry-Shaving Me <br />YGTBSM You've Got To Be S----ing Me! <br />YHB_ You Have Been ______ <br />YHBW You Have Been Warned <br />YHGASPL You Have Got A Serious Problem, Lad! <br />YHGMTPO_ You Have Greatly Misunderstood The Purpose Of ______ <br />YHL You Have Lost <br />YHTBT You Had To Be There <br />YKIYEI You Killed It, You Eat It <br />YKWIM You Know What I Mean <br />YKYB You Know You've Been <br />YKYB_TLW You Know You've Been ______ing Too Long When . . . <br />YM You Mean <br />YMMV Your Mileage May Vary; literally, "your experience may differ". <br />YOYO You're On Your Own <br />YR Yeah Right <br />YSS You Suck Severely <br />YWHOL Yelling "WooHoo" Out Loud (as in LOL) <br />YWSYLS You Win Some, You Lose Some <br /> <br />Z <br />ZNT ZiffNeT <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106257747872184227?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1061662532769232192003-08-24T02:15:00.000+08:002003-08-27T13:22:47.620+08:00isang <a href="http://www.geocities.com/notredamebatch83/kanta">kanta para sa mga miyembro ng SMAP (samahan ng mga malalamig ang pasko)</a>. sana nawa eh gumanda ang mga lovelife nyo. ito'y rock and roll cover version ng "goodbye to love", isang popular na kanta ng carpenters. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106166253276923219?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1061564729151088592003-08-22T23:05:00.000+08:002003-08-22T23:05:29.063+08:00<center><img src="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p88f5eddef4a00d44cd614f6d275253a3/fb5b55d9.jpg" width="450" height="338" alt="manila bay sunset" align="center"></center> <br /> <br /><center>sunset sa <a href="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p7394bb840bdad05b928f0707a56d195d/fb5b569e.jpg">manila bay</a> with <br /><a href="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/pcaaee92effe8d374f9b87a68a1dd128a/fb5b5949.jpg">axl</a>, <a href="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p26adbcebe1ced11816548c0854da6a92/fb5b55ce.jpg">ate lannie</a>, <a href="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p304f789970192901dcd632bbc34307fe/fb5b55af.jpg">jet</a>, <a href="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p44684b5a490e6ab4de3066bf2818686e/fb5b55c3.jpg">lucas</a>, <a href="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p9a0489a3f266d62c704a4da64265622f/fb598228.jpg">darlene</a></center> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106156472915108859?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-106153413047102822003-08-22T14:35:00.000+08:002003-08-22T14:35:30.390+08:00Email X-change between <a href="http://kwentongtambay.blogspot.com/2003_07_01_kwentongtambay_archive.html#105759061867721396">SouthAfricanAustralianChinese</a> and <a href="http://www.nicanordavid.com/118-1882_IMG.JPG">SingaporeBasedPinoySiraUlo</a>... <br /> <br />-----Original Message----- <br />From: Bat, Jay <br />Sent: 22 August, 2003 11:55 AM <br />To: Stormin, Norman <br />Subject: Your PC <br /> <br />Hey stormin Norman! <br /> <br />I just had a glimpse of your new PC. Not bad! I kinda loved the DVD so I swapped it with my old CD drive. Hope you don't mind. <br /> <br />BatJay <br /> <br />-----Original Message----- <br />From: Stormin Norman [mailto:norman.stormin@downunder.com] <br />Sent: Friday, August 22, 2003 10:08 AM <br />To: 'Bat, Jay' <br />Subject: RE: Your PC <br /> <br />Hi Matey, <br /> <br />In a strong German/South African accent “ You haf to be kidding me! You jaast cannot be zerious , ZIS is definetly not ze vay to behaf and treat a friend , NO I must say ZIS is totally unacceptable behaviour!” Just kidding matey , you can use it until the AP conference as long as I get it back then understand JA? <br /> <br />Regards, <br />Stormin'Norman <br /> <br />-----Original Message----- <br />From: Bat, Jay <br />Sent: Friday, August 22, 2003 10:15 AM <br />To: 'norman.stormin@downunder.com' <br />Subject: RE: Your PC <br /> <br />hehehe.... no, i vas jast pulling yur leg. jerry got it real cheap from dell. more than half price! only problem is that it does not have a space bar. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-10615341304710282?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1061386010202914752003-08-20T21:26:00.000+08:002003-08-20T21:26:50.213+08:00<img src="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid75/p54597f13b626e8fecdc1a90578ebe369/fb5b3abc.jpg" width="450" height="338" alt="gumamelang violet sa aking hardin" align="center"> <br /> <br /><a href="http://www.joeyayala.com.ph/english/album/lyrics/sadya.html">"bulaklak sa paanan naghihintay ng pansin <br />ano pa ang buhay niya kundi mo langhapin"</a> <br /> <br />walang ibang sadya, joey ayala <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106138601020291475?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1060445838972991212003-08-10T00:17:00.000+08:002003-08-10T01:16:24.936+08:00<u>bihirang dumalaw ang matalik na kaibigan sa singapore</u> <br /> <br /><center><img src="http://nicanordavid.com/birdpark-2.jpg" width="188" height="155" alt="jay and nes" align="center"></center> <br /> <br />kuha namin ni nes sa jurong bird park kanina. matagal na kaming magkaibigan ni nes. mahigit 32 years na. isa siya sa mga classmates ko since kinder. actually, siya ang pinaka-una kong naging kabarkada kasi pareho ang section namin simula kinder, hanggang grade 6. pagtapos batch mates kami hanggang nagtapos ng high school nung 1983. patuloy pa rin kaming nagkita-kita pagtapos ng graduation at hanggang ngayon, magkaibigan pa rin kami. <br /> <br />isa si nes sa mga hinahangaan kong tao. matalino, masipag at magaling mag basketball. bukod sa matataas na grades, pinuno rin niya ng extra curricular activities ang kanyang high school career: head ng sports commitee ng sudent's advisory board, varsity player, captain ng basketball team at athlete of the year ng batch namin. <br /> <br />si nes ay isang doctor. graduate ng UERM at espesyalista sa internal medicine. malimit siyang dumadalaw sa bahay namin para kamustahin ang mommy ko. nung minsan nagka pneumonia ang mommy ko. tinakbo ko siya sa hospital at si nes ang gumamot sa kanya. di ko pa rin makalimutan hanggan ngayon kung papaano niya inasikaso ang mommy ko. simula admission hanggang sa mga tests, hindi pinabayaan ni nes ang mommy ko. suwerte talaga ako sa mga kaibigan. kahit di kami masyadong mayaman, nagtutulungan kami sa kahit anong paraan. <br /> <br /><center><img src="http://nicanordavid.com/birdpark-1.jpg" width="300" height="225" alt="jet and tess" align="center"></center> <br /> <br />si tess at jet sa harap ng waterfall ng bird park. si tess ay asawa ni ness. si jet ay asawa ko. naging magkaibigan din sila dahil sa amin. anak ni nes at tess si cheska. siyempre, inaanak ko si cheska. kumpare ko kasi si nes eh. hehehe. si jet ay dating nurse ngayon, isa nang masayang housewife. si tess ay isa ring doctor tulad ni nes. si cheska ay hindi pa nag-aaral kaya di ko alam kung gusto niya rin maging doctor. si tess ay isang capitan sa AFP at doctor siya sa V Luna (ang military hospital sa quezon city). dati siyang PSG nung presidente si erap kaya marami kaming tsismis tungkol sa pamilya ni joseph estrada. but that is another story. <br /> <br />si nes ay dati ring capitan sa AFP. umalis na siya sa serbisyo. sabi niya sa akin eh "<em>nabuburat na raw siya sa buhay militar</em>" kaya siya umalis. di ko siya masisisi. tingnan mo nga ang mga ulul na opisyal sa maynila - puro pampapoging coup na punong puno ng katangahan lang ang alam sa buhay. <br /> <br /><center><img src="http://nicanordavid.com/birdpark-4.jpg" width="300" height="225" alt="sentosa" align="center"></center> <br /> <br />narito sina tess at nes sa singapore kasama ang kanilang pinsan na si sheila at ang kanyang asawa. bagong kasal si sheila at parang honeymoon nila ang pagparito. kagabi ay nasa night safari kami. ngayon naman ay tumuloy kami sa bird park nung umaga, nag lunch sa orchard road at dumiretso sa sentosa sa hapon. gabi na kaming umuwi kanina, medyo pagod pero masaya. bihira lang dumalaw ang kaibigan dito sa singapore. mas lalong bihirang dumalaw ang matalik na kaibigan kung kaya't masaya namin silang sinamahan sa kanilang pamamasyal ngayong weekend. <br /> <br /><center><img src="http://nicanordavid.com/birdpark-5.jpg" width="300" height="225" alt="si jet sa orchard road, b&w kuha ni animal husbandry" align="center"></center> <br /> <br />ito si jet kanina sa orchard road. ganda niya ano? ngayon alam nyo na kung bakit ko siya <a href="http://nicanordavid.com/herethere-1.mp3">kinakantahan</a>.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106044583897299121?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1060175851364146812003-08-06T21:17:00.000+08:002003-08-06T21:17:31.313+08:00<a href="http://sinned.blogspot.com/2002_08_11_sinned_archive.html">ito ang dahilan kung bakit ako nagsusulat sa tagalog</a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-106017585136414681?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1059746391252858982003-08-01T21:59:00.000+08:002003-08-01T21:59:51.050+08:00kung sino man ang nagsulat nito, saludo ako sa pang-aalaska mo kaibigan... <br /> <br />Mahal kong Lt. SG Antonio Trillanes IV, <br /> <br />Magandang umaga. Nawa'y maigi ang iyong kalagayan d'yan sa stockade. Magpahinga ka muna bago ka humarap sa court martial. Hindi bale nang litisin ka, nakapag-stay sa naman sa Oakwood, samantalang kami, pinaasa mong walang pasok ngayon. KJ ka talaga. <br /> <br />Sinulat ko ang liham na ito para puriin ka sa iyong kagitingan na ipaalam sa buong sambayanang Pilipino ang kabulukang nangyayari sa ating gobyerno. Mabuhay ka. Ang problema nga lang, alam na namin lahat iyon, Kapitan Trillanes. Hindi na ninyo kailangan pang magtanim ng bomba at magpapogi sa inyong mga fatigues para lang ipaalam sa buong madla na may mga katiwalian sa gobyerno. <br /> <br />Hindi tuloy ako nakapanood ng Terminator 3, eh malapit nang mawala sa sine 'yon. Okay sana kung nagbakbakan kayo ng mga sundalo ng gobyerno. <br /> <br />Mala-THE ROCK saka DIE HARD sana ang nangyari. Kaso, nagsisisigaw lamang kayo sa lobby ng Oakwood. Para ano pa ang inyong mga armband? Sabagay pwede na kayong magtayo ng boutique na ang brand name ay Magdalo. Pwde kayong magtinda ng mga armbands, fatigue-inspired pants, caps at shades. Ipwesto nyo dyan sa Oakwood para strategic ang location at may sentimental value pa. Bebenta kayo, promise. <br /> <br />Sa launch ng inyong boutique, pwede kayong maglagay ng mga bomba sa parking lot tapos magpaparty kayo doon. Masaya di ba? Mabalik tayo sa layunin ng liham na ito. Yung sinasabi mong nagbebenta si Secretary Reyes ng bala sa mga rebelde, aba, lumang balita na 'yan. Alam na naming mga ordinaryong tao yan. Bakit? Kaugalian na nating mga Pilipino ang mag-sideline di ba? Sa opisina nga namin may nagtitinda ng tsinelas, beads, tocino, tapa, muffins saka bags. <br /> <br />Eh hayaan mo nang magbenta si Secretary Reyes ng bala sa kanila, baka gawang Taiwan lang naman yung mga bala na 'yon. Mahirap buhay eh, magkano lang naman sweldo ni Secretary Reyes. Malamang lumilihis yung mga bala o kaya puro supot. <br /> <br />Yun namang sinasabi mong si GMA ang nag-utos ng pambobomba sa Davao, alam na rin naming mga Pilipino 'yon. Kaw naman, Kapitan Trillanes, sa pagka-tsismoso nating mga Pilipino, sino ba naman hindi nakakaalam na gobyerno gumagawa ng mga kalokohang 'yon? <br /> <br />Plaza Miranda, Jabidah Massacre, pagpatay kay Ninoy, Rizal Day bombings, at kung anu-ano pang kababalaghan, alam na naming gobyerno gumagawa. Hindi naman kami istupido noh! Sabi nga ng mga taga-Assumption, "We're not like tanga naman..." <br /> <br />Ang drama-drama mo masyado, eh kami namang mga ordinaryong tao tinatawanan na lang mga katiwalian sa gobyerno. May linya ka pang "we're ready to die for our principles." Huuu...if I know, gusto mo lang magpa-spa sa Oakwood kasi sira na ang <br />iyong kutis dahil sa kagat ng lamok sa Basilan. Dapat sinabi mo na lang sa akin, may murang spa dyan sa Quezon Avenue, may "extra" pa. <br /> <br />Ayan tuloy, nagsara Glorietta ng isang isang araw. Lagot ka, milyon nalugi sa mga Ayala. Baka pabayaran lahat sa 'yo yan. At saka naman Kapitan Trillanes, next time kayo magta-take over ng anumang lugar, 'wag naman sa mall. Hindi bagay sa inyong mga fatigues and armbands. Sino ba scriptwriter ninyo? Tsugiin! Mali ang location ng action! Ni walang symbolic o strategic meaning ang Oakwood. <br /> <br />Hindi kayo nanood ng THE ROCK ano? Hay nako, may pasok tuloy ngayon. Nabitin kami. Pogi points ka pa sa mga girls kasi ang guapo mo sa fatigue. Yun nga lang, you didn't die for your principles. May paiyak-iyak and hug pa kayo. Kaya kayo tinatawanan ng Abu Sayyaf, malalambot ang puso ninyo, madrama kayo masyado. Ganyan ba kayo sa Basilan? 'Pag rat-ratan na, yayakapan na lang kayo at umiiyak? God, it's so nakakahiya naman to the enemy. Hay nako, Kapitan Trillanes, mag-direct ka na lang ng pelikula ha? Tingin ko mas magaling ka pa kay Ang Lee kasi militar ka talaga. Maganda yung mga subplots na naisip mo. Maganda rin yung mga dialogue mo. <br /> <br />'Pag nag-direct ka na ng movie, make sure may bakbakang matindi sa huli. Yung tipong mawawarak yung buong building. Yun, mas exciting, hindi yung katulad kahapon. <br /> <br /> <br />Nagmamahal, <br />Ang iyong tagahanga <br /> <div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-105974639125285898?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1059378830346466972003-07-28T15:53:00.000+08:002003-07-28T15:53:50.173+08:00<u>nag coup ang mga bobo at nilugmok ang mga pinoy sa shit</u> <br /> <br />well, i can confirm that some <a href="http://www.sinosplice.com/network/">blog sites are blocked in china</a>, particularly, blogspot. pero iyong interactive-X naman ay hindi blocked. may topak rin ang gobyerno rito. di ba nila alam, pag pinipigil, lalong nang gigigil. di rin naman effective ang blocking dahil, pwede siguro i-bypass ito by hosting your site outside of blogger.com, or better yet, find another blog provider. <br /> <br />isa pang may topak eh yung mga nag coup sa maynila. para sa mga sundalong nag-coup: "ang TATANGA ninyo!. Bwakananginangyan, gagawa lang ng gulo, walang kaplano plano. dapat sa inyo eh, tanggalan ng baril at hamunin ng suntukan eh. o ano, laban kayo pag walang baril? ha? ha? bobo! <br /> <br />may suspetsa ako na may mastermind ding tanga na nagplano rito eh. <a href="http://www.inq7.net/opi/2003/jul/28/opi_editorial-1.htm">what's the objective of this silly coup? to sink the philippines deeper into shit!</a>. no plans, no support, no reason. well, there are reasons but the manner to voice their concerns was waaay off tangent. stupid! stupid! stupid! dapat eh bigyan sila ng lecture sa armed struggle. <br /> <br />ang puso ko, ang puso ko. hehehe. sige mylab, kain muna kaming lunch. just arrived in beijing. talk to you tonight. <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-105937883034646697?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-1058641425414289562003-07-20T03:03:00.000+08:002003-07-20T03:03:45.323+08:00<center>paborito kong <a href="http://www.alsirat.com/epitaphs/">epitaph</a> <br /> <br />here lies ang <a href="http://www.geocities.com/tiamatjr/atheism.html">atheist</a> <br />all dressed up <br />but nowhere to go</center><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-105864142541428956?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-933681222003-04-28T08:50:00.000+08:002003-06-23T19:46:08.000+08:00<b>SARS OFFICE TEMPERATURE TRACKING SYSTEM</b> <br /> <br />Note: The new Singapore Office Regulation says all employees are now required to check body temperature twice a day. If my body temperature rises above 38 Deg. C, you know where to find me... <br /> <br />MY BODY TEMPERATURE: <br /> <br />Fri, 25 Apr. AM: 36.2 Deg C, PM: 36.2 Deg C <br />Mon, 28 Apr. AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Tue, 29 Apr. AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.7 Deg C <br />Wed, 30 Apr. AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.0 Deg C <br />Thu, 01 May LABOR DAY!!! HIPHIP,YEHEY! <br />Fri, 02 May AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.4 Deg C <br />Mon, 05 May AM: 36.6 Deg C, PM: inameeting&forgot <br />Tue, 06 May AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Wed, 07 May AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.8 Deg C <br />Thu, 08 May AM: 36.5 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Fri, 09 May AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.8 Deg C <br />Mon, 12 May AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.7 Deg C <br />Tue, 13 May AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Wed, 14 May AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.2 Deg C <br />Thu, 15 May AM: vesak day - no work with pay! <br />Fri, 16 May AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.8 Deg C <br />Mon, 19 May AM: 36.6 Deg C, PM: 36.7 Deg C <br />Tue, 20 May AM: 36.3 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Wed, 21 May : nasa Seoul, nagpapalamig <br />Thu, 22 May : nasa Seoul, nagpapalamig <br />Fri, 23 May : nasa Seoul, nagpapalamig <br />Mon, 26 May AM: 36.6 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Tue, 27 May AM: 36.5 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Wed, 28 May AM: 36.5 Deg C, PM: 36.5 Deg C <br />Thu, 29 May AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.5 Deg C <br />Fri, 30 May AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.7 Deg C <br />Mon, 02 June to Mon, 09 June: nasa pilipinas nagtatrabaho <br />Tue, 10 June AM: 36.7 Deg C, PM: 36.7 Deg C <br />Wed, 11 June AM: 36.6 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Thu, 12 June AM: 36.6 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Fri, 13 June AM: 36.6 Deg C, PM: 36.6 Deg C <br />Mon, 16 June AM: 36.9 Deg C, PM: 36.9 Deg C <br />Tue, 17 June AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.8 Deg C <br />Thu, 20 June AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.8 Deg C <br />Mon, 23 June AM: 36.8 Deg C, PM: 36.8 Deg C <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-93368122?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-933043872003-04-27T01:54:00.000+08:002003-04-27T01:54:18.003+08:00<a href="http://www.weddingvendors.com/music/lyrics/song-169.html">have i told you lately</a>, van morrison <br /><a href="http://www.lyricsfreak.com/b/bob-seger/86250.htm">we've got tonight</a>, bob seger <br /><a href="http://www.jonimitchell.com/HitsTaxi70.html">big yellow taxi</a>, joni mitchell <br /><a href="http://www.bombshells.com/gallery/davis/davis_eyes.shtml">bette davis eyes</a>, kim carnes <br /><a href="http://www.hotbluesband.it/Testi_Dischi/TESTI/proud_mary_testo%20%20.htm">proud mary</a>, ccr <br /><a href="http://www.nicksfix.com/dreams.htm">dreams</a>, fleetwood mac <br /> <br /><b>covered songs whose original versions must be part of your playlist</b>. in fact, you can throw away the cover versions. hehehe... <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-93304387?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-931668652003-04-24T16:47:00.000+08:002003-04-24T16:58:55.000+08:00Habang nag-se-search ng mga artist na kasali sa <a href="http://www.dtskaraoke.com/philhitarwor1.html"> "PHILIPPINE HITS - AROUND THE WORLD KARAOKE"</a>, napadaan ako sa binebentang CD sa <a href="http://www.kabayancentral.com/music/centra/mmacd545.html">Pinoy Central</a> na pinamagatang "Kukurutin Ko" ni Bert Dominic. <br /> <br />Sino si Bert Dominic? Naiintriga ako sa kanya. Bakit ganito ang title ng mga kanta niya? <br /> <br />Kukurutin Ko <br />Titina <br />Kay Tsong, Kay Tsang <br />Johnny's Bird <br />Tutubing Karayom <br />Nawawalang Bikini <br />Hapi Na Si Manoy <br />Ang Seksi Mo Darling <br />Ang Siyota Kong Putol <br />Mag-ingat Kay Ate Aida <br />Awit Kay Mahal <br />Ang Nobya Kong Pinay <br />Okey Lang <br />Kayakap Ko Ay Unan <br />Girl, Naaalala Kita <br />Ibig Kong Bumalik Sa Maynila <br />Miss Na Miss Kita <br />Di Kita Malilimutan <br /> <br />sino si bert dominic? tutuo ba siyang tao, o kathang isip ng isang corning-bastos na tulad ko? <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-93166865?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-931121372003-04-23T22:04:00.000+08:002003-04-23T22:04:38.403+08:00Ang Balita ay Handog sa Inyo ng Joy, ang Tissueng Punet! <br /> <br />Host: Missis, why do you use Joy Tissue? <br />Missis: Simply and honestly, it's because it's absorb more pawis! <br />(Ay, it's absorb!) <br /> <br />-galing sa boob tube booboos ni nestor torre<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-93112137?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-929856722003-04-21T23:15:00.000+08:002003-04-21T23:15:11.576+08:00<img src="http://www.onefunsite.com/images/batdog.jpg" width="350" height="354" alt="si BatDog, ang kilabot ng mga paniki" align="center"> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92985672?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-929856202003-04-21T23:14:00.000+08:002003-04-21T23:14:14.590+08:00<img src="http://www.angelfire.com/on/bigfalcon/images/idvolteshalf.jpg" width="250" height="174" alt="ahhhh! Voltes V" align="center"> <br /> <br />Mga Kababayan, magsitago na kayo.... andyan nang mga Hapon!!! <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92985620?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-929537552003-04-21T08:40:00.000+08:002003-04-21T08:40:53.403+08:00<b>Singapore SARS Update:</b> <br /> <br />TREATED AND DISCHARGED: 104 (up 13 from 5 days ago) <br />IN HOSPITAL: 58 (down 3) <br />IN CRITICAL CONDITION: 19 (up 3) <br />DEAD: 14+2 (up 1) <br />TOTAL NUMBER OF CASES: 178 (up 11 new cases) <br />INDEX CASES: 7 (no change, ibig sabihin wala nang galing sa abroad na nakakahawa sa local population) <br />SUSPECT CASES: 87 91 (down 4) <br />UNDER HOME QUARANTINE: 599 (last available info from 5 days ago) <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92953755?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-928848792003-04-19T20:24:00.000+08:002003-04-19T20:26:45.000+08:00<b>MGA KASALUKUYANG BINABASANG COMICS...</b> <br /> <br /><img src="http://www.marsimport.com/images/YLASTMT01.JPG" width="75" height="117" alt="Y: The Last Man" align="LEFT"> <br /><a href="http://www.silverbulletcomicbooks.com/reviews/104413182863125,print.htm">1. Y: The Last Man: Unmanned</a> <br />In the summer of 2002, a plague of unknown origin destroyed every last sperm, fetus, and fully developed mammal with a Y chromosome - with the apparent exception of one young man and his male pet. This "gendercide" instantaneously exterminated 48% of the global population, or approximately 2.9 billion men. <br /> <br /> <br /><a href="http://www.dccomics.com/features/lucifer/index.html">2. Lucifer Morningstar, The Divine Comedy</a> <br /><img src="http://www.dccomics.com/features/lucifer/images/lrg_lucdccvr.jpg" width="88" height="127" alt="Lucifer Morningstar, Divine Comedy" align="right"> <br />Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste...Lucifer Morningstar, the fallen angel of light, the former Lord of Hell, and the owner of a fashionable Los Angeles based piano bar called Lux. On his ongoing quest to escape predestination, Lucifer is accompanied by his faithful servant and lover, the beautiful female demon Mazikeen, one of the daughters of Lilith. <br /> <br /> <br /><img src="http://www.dccomics.com/directcurrents/comics/Oct_30/covers/SP_Furieshc.jpg" width="108" height="160" alt="The Furies" align="left"> <br /><a href="http://www.hillcity-comics.com/graphic_novels/new_graphic_novel1307.htm">3. Sandman Presents: The Furies</a> <br /> <br />In the three years since Daniel left to fulfill his destiny as the new Sandman, Lyta has suffered greatly from the loss of her only son. Now the bloodline that has made her kin to the Furies has taken over her senses' and her sanity. In an effort to escape her pain and unravel her mysterious heritage before it consumes her, Lyta accepts a job with a traveling theatre troupe on its way to Athens, Greece. But a series of cruel and familiar mythological figures set their sites on destroying the Furies and plan to use Lyta Hall as the ultimate pawn. <br /> <br /> <br /><a href="http://www.rambles.net/arkham.html">4. Batman: Arkham Asylum</a> <br /><img src="http://www.rambles.net/illustrations/arkham.gif" width="90" height="140" alt="Batman: Arkham Asylum" align="right"> <br />The story is about Batman and his sanity, or possible lack of such. For the most part, it takes place in Gotham City’s Arkham Asylum, where all the really crazy arch-villains are kept. The criminally insane have taken over the asylum and The Joker is demanding that Batman come inside with them where he belongs. Most of the story deals with this confrontation, interwoven with the gruesome history of the place. At the time of the story some of the inhabitants include The Joker, The Scarecrow, Mr. Destiny, and Two-Face. <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92884879?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-928445532003-04-19T00:40:00.000+08:002003-04-19T00:40:38.466+08:00<b>mga pinagbabasa ko ngayon:</b> <br /> <br />the last vampire <br />the excorcist <br /> <br />que horror, puro horror. <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92844553?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-928397672003-04-18T23:05:00.000+08:002003-04-18T23:05:36.513+08:00<b>Think About It </b> <br /> <br />Death is hereditary. <br /> <br />The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier. <br /> <br />The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country. <br />(attributed to George W Bush Jr.) <br /> <br />You never know what real happiness is until you get married, and then it is too late. <br /> <br />Marriage is a very expensive way to get your laundry done. <br /> <br />The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it. <br /> <br />All things being equal, fat people use more soap. <br /> <br />No amount of advance planning will ever replace dumb luck. <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92839767?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-928386402003-04-18T22:42:00.000+08:002003-04-18T22:42:52.216+08:00try try must die! <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92838640?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-928342222003-04-18T20:54:00.000+08:002003-04-18T20:58:27.000+08:00<b>BUMPER STICKER BLUES</b> <br /> <br />BEAUTY is in the eye of the beer holder. <br /> <br />All men are idiots... and I married their king. <br /> <br />The more you complain, the longer God makes you live. <br /> <br />I(nternal) R(evenue) S(ervice): <br />We've got what it takes to take what you've got. <br /> <br />Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now. <br /> <br />Out of my mind...Back in five minutes. <br /> <br />As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools. <br /> <br />Hang up and drive. <br /> <br />God must love stupid people...He made SO many. <br /> <br />Your kid may be an Honor Student, but YOU'RE still an idiot. <br /> <br />Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips. <br /> <br />I took an IQ test and the results were negative. <br /> <br />Where there's a will...I want to be in it. <br /> <br />It's lonely at the top, but you eat better. <br /> <br />Don't drink and drive...You might hit a bump and spill your drink. <br /> <br />Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. <br /> <br />Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? <br /> <br />Always remember you're unique...Just like everyone else. <br /> <br />Who lit the fuse on your tampon? <br /> <br />I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit. <br /> <br />I wasn't born a bitch. Men like you made me this way. <br /> <br />Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either! <br /> <br />Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change. <br /> <br />EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later. <br /> <br />If you can read this I can hit my brakes and sue you <br /> <br />My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her...or something like that. <br /> <br />Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive. <br /> <br />If we are what we eat, I'm cheap, fast, and easy. <br /> <br />Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92834222?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-927634522003-04-17T14:17:00.000+08:002003-04-19T11:12:31.000+08:00<img src="http://www.inq7.net/archive/2003/apr/17/zoom.jpg" width="320" height="240" alt="Bwakanginangyan, ang laki ng Bagyong paparating sa Pilipinas" ><br /> <br /><br /> <br />Bwakanginangyan, ang laki ng Bagyong paparating sa Pilipinas!!!<br /> <br /><br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92763452?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-924322912003-04-11T23:29:00.000+08:002003-04-11T23:29:07.110+08:00Examples of SingLish: A short conversation between CK, a boy of nearly 6, and his next door neighbour, whom he calls 'Uncle'. <br /> <br />[N is at the door of the CK's' house] <br />CK: Uncle! Uncle get me my ball, I got big one for you. <br />N: Why? <br />CK: Inside the house. <br />N: Where's that big bicycle? <br />SK: Gone. [SK is CK's mother] <br />CK: Big bicycle taken away. <br />N: Taken away already. <br />CK: No. Because going Toa Payoh. <br />N: Going Toa Payoh. Oh oh. Then bicycle go first ah. OK you go with them. <br />CK: Don't mind hah. Know where also. <br />N: Ah. <br />CK: There my gra- my grandmoth- my my- My uncle also went. <br />N: Next time you grow up you take over the big one. <br />CK: Yeah. [N laughs] <br />CK: Then my mo- brother take over my one. [CK & N laugh] Yeah ah. <br />N: As soon as he take yours ah,you take your father's one. [N laughs] <br /> <br />naintindihan nyo ba? <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-92432291?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-916065922003-03-30T00:16:00.000+08:002003-03-30T00:16:19.640+08:00 <br />an iraqi account of war in his country...<a href="http://dear_raed.blogspot.com/">Where is Raed ?</a> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-91606592?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-907445012003-03-15T11:13:00.000+08:002003-03-15T11:13:27.640+08:00Seinfeldisms <br /> <br />1. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? <br /> <br />2. Can fat people go skinny-dipping? <br /> <br />3. Can you be a closet claustrophobic? <br /> <br />4. Why is the word abbreviation so long? <br /> <br />5. Is it possible to be totally partial? <br /> <br />6. What's another word for thesaurus? <br /> <br />7. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success? <br /> <br />8. If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off? <br /> <br />9. When companies ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in? <br /> <br />10. If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? <br /> <br />11. If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound? <br /> <br />12. If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? <br /> <br />13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? <br /> <br />14. When it rains, why don't sheep shrink? <br /> <br />15. Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? <br /> <br />16. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift? <br /> <br />17. What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants? <br /> <br />18. Do hurry crows have ravenous appetites? <br /> <br />19. Why is bra singular and panties plural? <br /> <br />20. If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? <br /> <br />21. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? <br /> <br />22. Instead of talking to you plants, if you yelled at them, would they still grow? Only to be troubled and insecure? <br /> <br />23. Is there another word for synonym? <br /> <br />24. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?" <br /> <br />25. When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs? <br /> <br />26. When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away? <br /> <br />27. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?" <br /> <br />28. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? (ewwww!!) <br /> <br />29. Why do they report power outages on TV? <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-90744501?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-905866552003-03-12T22:14:00.000+08:002003-04-19T11:10:18.000+08:00<img src="http://www.joserizal.ph/img/illustrados.jpg" width="250" height="132" alt="di kailangan maging bayani para paangatin ang sariling buhay" align="center"> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-90586655?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-899356592003-03-01T11:09:00.000+08:002003-03-01T11:09:33.280+08:00<b>eto pa...</b> <br /> <br /><i>The thrill is gone <br />The thrill is gone <br />I can see it in your eyes <br />I can hear it in your sighs <br />Feel your touch and realize <br />The thrill is gone </i> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-89935659?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-886453072003-02-06T21:07:00.000+08:002003-04-19T11:05:56.000+08:00<img src="http://www.ibiblio.org/Dave/Dr-Fun/df200301/df20030109.jpg" width="320" height="240" alt="edward toiletbrushhands" align="center"> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-88645307?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-885266352003-02-04T19:54:00.000+08:002003-02-04T19:54:51.960+08:00<a href="http://www.afi.com/tv/movies.asp">AFI's 100 Years...100 Movies</a> <br /> <br />1. CITIZEN KANE (1941) <br />2. CASABLANCA (1942) <br />3. THE GODFATHER (1972) <br />4. GONE WITH THE WIND (1939) <br />5. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA (1962) <br />6. THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939) <br />7. THE GRADUATE (1967) <br />8. ON THE WATERFRONT (1954) <br />9. SCHINDLER'S LIST (1993) <br />10. SINGIN' IN THE RAIN (1952) <br />11. IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE (1946) <br />12. SUNSET BOULEVARD (1950) <br />13. THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI (1957) <br />14. SOME LIKE IT HOT (1959) <br />15. STAR WARS (1977) <br />16. ALL ABOUT EVE (1950) <br />17. THE AFRICAN QUEEN (1951) <br />18. PSYCHO (1960) <br />19. CHINATOWN (1974) <br />20. ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST (1975) <br />21. THE GRAPES OF WRATH (1940) <br />22. 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968) <br />23. THE MALTESE FALCON (1941) <br />24. RAGING BULL (1980) <br />25. E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (1982) <br />26. DR. STRANGELOVE (1964) <br />27. BONNIE AND CLYDE (1967) <br />28. APOCALYPSE NOW (1979) <br />29. MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON (1939) <br />30. THE TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE (1948) <br />31. ANNIE HALL (1977) <br />32. THE GODFATHER PART II (1974) <br />33. HIGH NOON (1952) <br />34. TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD (1962) <br />35. IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT (1934) <br />36. MIDNIGHT COWBOY (1969) <br />37. THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES (1946) <br />38. DOUBLE INDEMNITY (1944) <br />39. DOCTOR ZHIVAGO (1965) <br />40. NORTH BY NORTHWEST (1959) <br />41. WEST SIDE STORY (1961) <br />42. REAR WINDOW (1954) <br />43. KING KONG (1933) <br />44. THE BIRTH OF A NATION (1915) <br />45. A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE (1951) <br />46. A CLOCKWORK ORANGE (1971) <br />47. TAXI DRIVER (1976) <br />48. JAWS (1975) <br />49. SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS (1937) <br />50. BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID (1969) <br />51. THE PHILADELPHIA STORY (1940) <br />52. FROM HERE TO ETERNITY (1953) <br />53. AMADEUS (1984) <br />54. ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT (1930) <br />55. THE SOUND OF MUSIC (1965) <br />56. M*A*S*H (1970) <br />57. THE THIRD MAN (1949) <br />58. FANTASIA (1940) <br />59. REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE (1955) <br />60. RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (1981) <br />61. VERTIGO (1958) <br />62. TOOTSIE (1982) <br />63. STAGECOACH (1939) <br />64. CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND (1977) <br />65. THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS (1991) <br />66. NETWORK (1976) <br />67. THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE (1962) <br />68. AN AMERICAN IN PARIS (1951) <br />69. SHANE (1953) <br />70. THE FRENCH CONNECTION (1971) <br />71. FORREST GUMP (1994) <br />72. BEN-HUR (1959) <br />73. WUTHERING HEIGHTS (1939) <br />74. THE GOLD RUSH (1925) <br />75. DANCES WITH WOLVES (1990) <br />76. CITY LIGHTS (1931) <br />77. AMERICAN GRAFFITI (1973) <br />78. ROCKY (1976) <br />79. THE DEER HUNTER (1978) <br />80. THE WILD BUNCH (1969) <br />81. MODERN TIMES (1936) <br />82. GIANT (1956) <br />83. PLATOON (1986) <br />84. FARGO (1996) <br />85. DUCK SOUP (1933) <br />86. MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY (1935) <br />87. FRANKENSTEIN (1931) <br />88. EASY RIDER (1969) <br />89. PATTON (1970) <br />90. THE JAZZ SINGER (1927) <br />91. MY FAIR LADY (1964) <br />92. A PLACE IN THE SUN (1951) <br />93. THE APARTMENT (1960) <br />94. GOODFELLAS (1990) <br />95. PULP FICTION (1994) <br />96. THE SEARCHERS (1956) <br />97. BRINGING UP BABY (1938) <br />98. UNFORGIVEN (1992) <br />99. GUESS WHO'S COMING TO DINNER (1967) <br />100. YANKEE DOODLE DANDY (1942 <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-88526635?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-884230812003-02-02T23:13:00.000+08:002003-02-02T23:13:18.150+08:00 <br /><img src="http://www.wfcomics.com/gallery/kabuki/kabuki11.jpg" width="200" height="360" alt="kabuki ito pero pwede na rin - happy lunar new year..." align="center"> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-88423081?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-884032582003-02-02T10:49:00.000+08:002003-02-02T10:52:11.000+08:00<img src="http://www.dyve.net/sandman/images/poster.jpg" width="200" height="230" alt="lucifer morning star..." align="right"> <br />recent graphic novels read and re-read... <br /> <br /><a href="http://www.lucifermorningstar.com/trade.html">lucifer morningstar book 1, devil in the gateway</a> <br /><a href="http://www.lucifermorningstar.com/trade2.html">lucifer morningstar book 2, children and monsters </a> <br /><a href="http://www.lucifermorningstar.com/trade3.html">lucifer morningstar book 3, a dalliance with the damned</a> <br /><a href="http://www.dyve.net/sandman/">sandman books 1 to 10</a> <br /><a href="http://www.dccomics.com/directcurrents/collect/images/bomsc/pic_lrgbomsc1cvr.jpg">books of magic book 1</a> <br /><a href="http://www.wfcomics.com/kabuki/">kabuki-scarab</a> <br /><a href="http://www.geocities.com/BourbonStreet/3395/home.html">swamp thing, book 2 love and death</a> <br /><a href="http://continuitypages.com/swampthingMOORE.htm">swamp thing, book 4 a murder of crows</a> <br /><a href="http://www.elseworlds.net/index.html">batman, crimson mist</a> <br /><a href="http://www.khepri.com/bat-masq.htm">batman, masque</a> <br /><a href="http://www.dccomics.com/features/fables/intro.html">fables, legends in exile</a> <br /><a href="http://www.strangehorizons.com/2002/20020211/harlequin.shtml">harlequin, valentine</a> <br /><a href="http://www.rambles.net/gaiman_murder02.html">neil gaiman, murder mysteries</a> <br /><a href="http://www.muscanet.com/~phoenix/books/rtp-review.html">road to perdition</a> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-88403258?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-879894722003-01-25T11:03:00.000+08:002003-01-25T11:03:59.500+08:00<b>newsweek's the top 15 movies released in 2002 that you should not miss</b> <br /> <br />#1 Y Tu Mama Tambien <br />Alfonso Cuarn's erotic, funny and poignant Mexican road movie is a coming-of-age classic. <br /> <br />#2 About Schmidt <br />Nicholson at his best in a Midwestern satire as funny as it is devastating. <br /> <br />#3 Spirited Away <br />Animation giant Hayao Miyazaki's enchanting magical mystery tour. <br /> <br />#4 Talk to her <br />Almodovar's moving meditation on love and friendship. <br /> <br />#5 The Pianist <br />Roman Polanski confronts the Holocaust and makes his best film since "Chinatown." <br /> <br />#6 Monsoon Wedding <br />Mira Nair's zesty multi-course Indian feast. <br /> <br />#7 Adaptation <br />Orchids, screenwriting, gators + 2 Nick Cages = one wild ride. <br /> <br />#8 About a Boy <br />Womanizing narcissist Hugh Grant rejoins the human race <br />in a sharp, hilarious comedy. <br /> <br />#9 Far From Heaven <br />Family values get revisited and revised in this sublime neo-'50s melodrama. <br /> <br />#10 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers <br />Another swirling, savage success. <br /> <br />#11 The Hours <br />Kidman, Streep and Moore in a luminous adaptation. <br /> <br />#12 Late Marriage <br />Tradition battles love: a fierce, sensual comedy from Israel. <br /> <br />#13 Chicago <br />A jazzy, snazzy Murder Row musical. <br /> <br />#14 Lovely and Amazing <br />This smart American indie tells things about women Hollywood never thought to ask. <br /> <br />#15 Minority Report <br />Bad ending aside, this future-shock thriller is a sensation. <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87989472?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-877793042003-01-21T20:48:00.000+08:002003-01-22T16:45:49.000+08:00<b>SIGNS</b> <br /> <br /> <br />1. At a Megalink ATM: <br /> "OOF LINE". <br /> <br />2. Nakasulat sa pader: <br /> "MARUNONG KA BANG KUMAHOL? ASO LANG ANG UMIIHI DITO!" <br /> <br />3. Along a highway in Pampanga: <br /> "WE MAKE MODERN ANTIQUE FURNITURE." <br /> <br />4. On a building in Cebu: <br /> Atty. Domingo Carriedo "NOTARY PUBLIC TUMATANGGAP DIN NG LABADA KUNG LINGGO" <br /> <br />5. On a self-service restaurant in Cebu: <br /> "PLEASE HELP OUR COMFORT ROOM CLEAN" <br /> <br />6. In a Baguio grocery: <br /> "FRESH FROZEN CHICKEN SOLD HERE" <br /> <br />7. On the gate of a house: <br /> "BEWARE! BITE YOU THE DOG!" <br /> <br />8. On a door of a two-storey building stairway: <br /> "SECOND FLOOR, UPSTAIRS..." <br /> <br />9. On a low beam post: <br /> "HEADS OFF, PLEASE." <br /> <br />10. On a house beside an auto repair shop: <br /> "NO PARKING AND REPAIR HERE" <br /> <br />11. Signs at PHILCOA: <br /> "NO CROSSING PEDESTRIANS WILL BE APPREHENDED" <br /> <br />12. In Baguio Country Club: <br /> "TEMPORARY CLOSE" <br /> <br />13. In Cubao: <br /> "NONE ID NOTHING ENTRY" <br /> <br />14. In a parking lot: <br /> "TAXI AND OUTSIDE CAR NOT ALLOWED" <br /> <br />15. Office clinic in Sta. Cruz: <br /> "DR. SAKIM A. MORGE. MD." <br /> <br />16. Along Luneta Boulevard: <br /> "BAWAL TUMAE SA BULEVARD" <br /> <br />17. Jeepney and Bus signs: <br /> "BEFORE PAY, TELL WHERE GET THE ON BEFORE GET THE OFF" <br /> <br />18. On a Flower shop in Rizal Avenue: <br /> "WE SELL ARTIFICIAL FRESH FLOWERS" <br /> <br />19. On a delivery truck: <br /> "NOT FOR HERE" <br /> <br />20. On window of a restaurant in Baguio: <br /> "WANTED: BOY WAITRESS" <br /> <br />21. On a street in San Juan: <br /> "BAWAL MAGTAPON NG BINALOT NA TAE RITO" <br /> <br />22. A grafitti inside the cubicle of a ladies' washroom in a university: <br /> "PLEASE DON'T SIT LIKE A FROG, SIT LIKE A QUEEN." <br /> <br />23. On a truck: <br /> "KUNG NABABASA MO 'TO, PAG-NAUTOT AKO MAAAMOY MO" <br /> <br />24. At a construction site in Mandaluyong: <br /> "BAWAL OMEHI DITO. ANG MAHOLI BOG-BOG" <br /> <br />25. Somewhere along San Andres: <br /> "NO URINATING, ON THE OVER WALLS" <br /> <br />26. Vacant lot near Makati Ave.: <br /> "DON'T PARKING" <br /> <br />27. At an eatery in Cebu: <br /> "WE HAB SOPDRINK IN CAN AND IN BATOL <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87779304?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-876779842003-01-19T20:59:00.000+08:002003-01-21T20:48:51.000+08:00<img src="http://www.pcij.org/ikabod.gif" width="150" height="150" alt="paalam nonoy..." align="center"> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87677984?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-876651312003-01-19T12:15:00.000+08:002003-01-19T12:15:15.356+08:00 <br />ACTUAL BUMPER STICKERS: <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />I love cats ... they taste just like chicken <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Cover me. I'm changing lanes. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public <br />schools <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Happiness is a belt-fed weapon <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather ... ... Not <br />screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car ... <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Tow-ers will be violated <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Montana -- At least our cows are sane! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Jesus died for my sins and all I got was this lousy T-shirt <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />The gene pool could use a little chlorine. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a >vegetarian. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Don't blame me, I'm from Uranus. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />It's as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in case heaven is like <br />the IRS. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Friends don't let Friends drive Naked. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Wink, I'll do the rest! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />I took an IQ test and the results were negative. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />When there's a will, I want to be in it! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check? <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat? <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its <br />students! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />It's lonely at the top, but you eat better. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Reality? That's where the pizza delivery guy comes from! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using Your Turn Signal ! <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />He/She who laughs last thinks slowest <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be <br />happy. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Consciousness: that annoying time between naps. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />i souport publik edekasion <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Why is "abbreviation" such a long word? <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can <br />find a rock. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with subatomic <br />particles. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />I killed a 6-pack just to watch it die. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br />Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off. <br />---------------------------------------------------------------------- <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87665131?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-876649312003-01-19T12:09:00.000+08:002003-01-19T12:09:40.973+08:00<b>Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery: </b> <br /> <br />"Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy." <br />"Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop" <br />"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness" <br />"Bo! Bo! Comeback with that! Bad Dog!" <br />"Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's <br /> that?" <br />"Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie" <br />"Oh no! I just lost my Rolex." <br />"Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff <br />before?" <br />"Damn, there go the lights again..." <br />"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's <br /> got two of 'em." <br />"Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!" <br />"Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing <br /> my concentration off" <br />"What's this doing here?" <br />"I hate it when they're missing stuff in here." <br />"That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!" <br />"I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses." <br />"Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us." <br />"Sterile, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right?" <br />"What do mean he wasn't in for a sex change...!" <br />"Anyone see where I left that scalpel?" <br />"And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in <br />the body of the ape." <br />"OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a <br /> freak of nature." <br />"This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?" <br />"Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?" <br />"Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough." <br />"What do you mean "You want a divorce"!" <br />"She's gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!" <br />"Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!" <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87664931?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-876268372003-01-18T13:35:00.000+08:002003-01-19T12:05:45.000+08:00<b>Things to do when you're Bored and want to annoy people..</b> <br /> <br />1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair <br />dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down. <br /> <br />2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice. <br /> <br />3) Insist that your e mail address is: Xena-Warrior-Princess@companyname.com, <br />or Elvis-the-King@companyname.com <br /> <br />4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. <br /> <br />5) Encourage your colleagues to ! join you in a little synchronized chair dancing. <br /> <br />6) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN." <br /> <br />7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers. <br /> <br />8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over <br />their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso. <br /> <br />9) In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexual favours.' <br /> <br />10) Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think." <br /> <br />11) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy." <br /> <br />12) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up <br />the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way. <br /> <br />13) Dont use any punctuation. <br /> <br />14) As often as possible, skip rather than walk. <br /> <br />15) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer. <br /> <br />16) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." <br /> <br />17) Sing along at the opera. <br /> <br />18) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme. <br /> <br />19) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear <br />them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your <br />boss is of the opposite gender.) <br /> <br />20) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing. <br />For example, "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom, in Stall #3." <br /> <br />21) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle sounds <br />all day. <br /> <br />22) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party <br />because you're not in the mood. <br /> <br />23) Call 911 and ask if 911 is for emergencies. <br /> <br />24) Call the psychic hotline and don't say anything. <br /> <br />! 25) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard. <br /> <br />26) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! "I Won!" "3rd time <br />this week!!!" <br /> <br />27) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling <br />"Run for your lives, they're loose!" <br /> <br />28) Tell your boss, "It's not the voices in my head that bother me, its the <br />voices in your head that do." <br /> <br />29) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to <br />have to let one of you go." <br /> <br />30) Every time you see a broom, yell "Honey, your mother is here!" <br /> <br />And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity.... <br /> <br />31) Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it <br />to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87626837?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-873991342003-01-14T12:16:00.000+08:002003-01-14T12:16:56.740+08:00 <br />GOLLUM RULES! <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87399134?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-872950602003-01-12T14:31:00.000+08:002003-01-12T14:34:13.000+08:00You Know It's Going To Be A Bad Day When: <br /> <br />You wake up face down on the pavement <br />You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold <br />You put your bra on backwards and it fits better <br />Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles <br />Your son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant would mind her own business <br />You want to put on the clothes you wore home from last night's party - and there aren't any <br />You turn on the news and they're showing emergency routes out of the city <br />Your twin sister forgets your birthday <br />You wake up to discover that your waterbed broke and then realize that you don't have a waterbed <br />Your horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway <br />You see the "60 Minutes" News Team waiting in your Office <br />Your boss tells you not to bother to take off you coat <br />You walk to work and discover that your dress is tucked in the back of your pantyhose <br />Your kid say "Did you know that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit down the toilet?" <br />Your driving to work smoking a cigarette. At a stop light, you drop it between your legs. As you frantically search for it, a full city bus pulls up alongside of your car. <br />You wake up to late to catch the van pool - then you realize that you're driving the van this week <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-87295060?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-857701782002-12-10T14:38:00.000+08:002002-12-10T14:38:51.310+08:00 <br />Quotes from The World According to Garp... <br /> <br />Garp <br />My name is T.S. Garp. <br /> <br />Helen <br />What's the T.S. stand for? <br /> <br />Garp <br />Terribly Sexy. I used to be Terribly Shy, but I changed. <br /> <br />Helen <br />I'm Helen Holm. <br /> <br />Garp <br />Oh, Holm sweet Holm. Our new wrestling coach here is named Holm. Boy, what a hard-ass! We call him "Holm sweat Holm". <br /> <br />Helen <br />He's my father. I'm his daughter. We're the Holm team <br /> <br />Garp <br />Oh. Take care. Ass-hole. <br /> <br />Garp <br />Well? <br /> <br />Jenny Fields <br />It's, uh...a bit thin. <br /> <br />Garp <br />Yeah, it's not the quantity that counts. <br /> <br />Jenny Fields <br />Thanks God for that! This is good enough for me. <br /> <br />Garp <br />That's not very artistic, though. <br /> <br />Jenny Fields <br />Well, I'm not an artist. I'm a nurse and it's about time I got back to it. <br /> <br />Garp <br />I wanna be an artist, and I want to know what you thought of it. <br /> <br />Jenny Fields <br />I'm not sure I understand it. <br /> <br />Garp <br />Mom, it's very simple. He can do wonders when he's wearing his magic gloves. If his wife is sad, he touches her with his gloves, she's happy. If his children are crying, he touches them, and they smile. But he can't feel them! He yearns to feel. He can even hold off death with his magic gloves, but he can't feel life. So, he takes off the gloves, and he dies. But, he finally feels life as he's flying into the arms of death. <br /> <br />Garp <br />We'll take the house. <br /> <br />Helen <br />Garp. <br /> <br />Garp <br />Honey, the chances of another plane hitting this house are astronomical. See? It's been pre-disastered. We're going to be safe here. <br /> <br />Garp <br />Nobody is buying my novel. I'm starting my second and the same nobodies are going to line up not to buy that one too. <br /> <br />Garp <br />We are civilized people, and civilized people obey rules! You Neolithic dipshit! <br /> <br />Babysitter <br />What does T.S. Stand for? <br /> <br />Garp <br />Terrebly Sad. I used to be Terrebly Sexy, but I changed <br /> <br />Babysitter <br />Oh, I don't think so <br /> <br />Garp <br />Really? <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85770178?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-857293932002-12-09T23:17:00.000+08:002002-12-09T23:17:03.776+08:00"In the world according to Garp, we are all terminal cases." <br /> <br />from the <a href="http://www.readinggroupguides.com/">ReadingGroupGuides.com</a>, please answer the following questions: <br /> <br />1. In an essay, John Irving writes about his frustration in trying to determine what The World According to Garp is about. He finally accepts his young son's conclusion: "The fear of death of the death of children--or of anyone you love." In your opinion, is this the most overt theme of the novel? <br /> <br />2. Feminism comes in many flavors in the novel. The most obvious, perhaps, are Jenny Field's straightforward brand of feminism, Ellen Jamesian's embittered, victimized type, and Roberta Muldoon's nurturing, female-embracing style. But are there other characters who portray less distinct, murkier shades of feminism? What is feminism in the lives of Helen Holm, Charlotte the prostitute, Mrs. Ralph, and other women in the novel? And what does feminism mean to Garp? <br /> <br />3. How does The World According to Garp ultimately assess the prospects of understanding between the sexes? Support your opinion with examples from the novel. <br /> <br />4. In the novel, we read about a variety of biographers' theories on why Garp stopped writing--and what motivated him to write again--albeit for a very short-lived time. Helen agreed that Garp's collision with his own mortality brought him back to his craft. If you were the biographer of T. S. Garp, what would your theory be? <br /> <br />5. Garp's vehemence against "political true believers" is a major force of the novel and he maintains that they are the sworn enemy of the artist. The Ellen Jamesians are a farcical portrayal of this notion. In your opinion, what is the relationship between art and politics--and is it possible for them to successfully coexist? <br /> <br />6. After the terrible accident in which Duncan is maimed, many pages pass before Walt's death is acknowledged to the reader. And then, it is given a tragic-comedic twist; Garp announces in an Alice Fletcher-like lisp that he "mish him." What was the effect of this narrative device on you? Was the sorrow intensified or assuaged? <br /> <br />7. The narrator's voice is ironically detached and almost flippant--even when delivering the most emotionally charged, heartbreaking moments in the novel. In what ways does the narrator contrast and play against the novel's dramatic elements? How is it similar--and different--from the voice of Garp? <br /> <br />8. People who have read and loved The World According to Garp consistently comment on the extraordinary ability of the novel to provoke laughter and tears simultaneously. Was this your experience as well? If so, how do you think this effect is achieved? <br /> <br />9. What is the significance of the meta-fiction--the stories within the story? How does Garp's "writing" voice compare to our perception of him as a character? <br /> <br />10. Over the last fifteen years The World According to Garp has entered the canon of literature. How do you think it is perceived now in comparison to when it was first published in the late '70s? Is the American moral center much different today than it was then? For example, despite Garp's and Helen's indiscretions, their relationship is still portrayed as loving and supportive. Do you think that today's social climate is as accepting of these kind of transgressions? <br /> <br />11. In his afterword, John Irving admits to having been "positively ashamed of how much lust was in the book. Indeed, every character in the story who indulges his or her lust is severely punished." How do you feel about that condemnation? Is the world an arguably more precarious place because of lust? <br /> <br />12. What do the peripheral characters contribute to the novel? Is there a common thread they share . . . Mrs. Ralph, the young hippie, Dean Bodger, Ernie Holm, "Old Tinch," the Fletchers? <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85729393?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-857254352002-12-09T21:25:00.000+08:002002-12-09T21:25:42.436+08:00 <br />Stupid True Headlines LIST <br /> <br />1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says <br />2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers <br />3. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted <br />4. Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case <br />5. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents <br />6. Farmer Bill Dies in House <br />7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms <br />8. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? <br />9. Stud Tires Out <br />10. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope <br />11. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over <br />12. Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again <br />13. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands <br />14. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms <br />15. Eye Drops off Shelf <br />16. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids <br />17. Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead <br />18. Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim <br />19. Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66 <br />20. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Axe <br />21. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told <br />22. Miners Refuse to Work after Death <br />23. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant <br />24. Stolen Painting Found by Tree <br />25. Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies <br />26. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter <br />27. Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years <br />28. Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One <br />29. Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84 <br />30. War Dims Hope for Peace <br />31. If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While <br />32. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures <br />33. Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide <br />34. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge <br />35. Deer Kill 17,000 <br />36. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead <br />37. Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge <br />38. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group <br />39. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft <br />40. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks <br />41. Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy <br />42. Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire <br />43. British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply <br />44. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood <br />45. Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees <br />46. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half <br />47. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies <br />48. Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing <br />49. Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing <br />50. Air Head Fired <br />51. Steals Clock, Faces Time <br />52. Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff <br />53. Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni <br />54. Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board <br />55. Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors <br />56. Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction <br />57. Sex Education Delayed, Teachers Request Training <br />58. Include your Children When Baking Cookies <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85725435?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-857252952002-12-09T21:21:00.000+08:002002-12-09T21:21:35.090+08:00 <br />things to do inside ang elevator... <br /> <br />Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off. <br /> <br />Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers. <br /> <br />Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!" <br /> <br />Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. <br /> <br />Sell Girl Scout cookies. <br /> <br />On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator. <br /> <br />Shave. <br /> <br />Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?" <br /> <br />Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down. <br /> <br />Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. <br /> <br />When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. <br /> <br />Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!" <br /> <br />Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. <br /> <br />One word: Flatulence! <br /> <br />On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom. <br /> <br />Do Tai Chi exercises. <br /> <br />Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!" <br /> <br />When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, motion sickness!" <br /> <br />Give religious tracts to each passenger. <br /> <br />Meow occassionally. <br /> <br />Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose. <br /> <br />Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected. <br /> <br />Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons. <br /> <br />Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends. <br /> <br />Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side. <br /> <br />Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator. <br /> <br />Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!" <br /> <br />Leave a box between the doors. <br /> <br />Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them. <br /> <br />Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it. <br /> <br />Start a sing-along. <br /> <br />When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?" <br /> <br />Play the harmonica. <br /> <br />Shadow box. <br /> <br />Say "Ding!" at each floor. <br /> <br />Lean against the button panel. <br /> <br />Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons. <br /> <br />Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope. <br /> <br />Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space." <br /> <br />Bring a chair along. <br /> <br />Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?" <br /> <br />Blow spit bubbles. <br /> <br />Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings. <br /> <br />Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body." <br /> <br />Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively. <br /> <br />Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. <br /> <br />Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers. <br /> <br />Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger." <br /> <br />If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!" <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85725295?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-855371992002-12-05T22:15:00.000+08:002002-12-05T22:15:33.536+08:00 <br />ABOUT FARTS...so, What Are You? <br /> <br />VAIN: A person who loves the smell of his own farts. <br /> <br />AMIABLE: A person who loves the smell of other people's farts. <br /> <br />PROUD: A person who thinks his farts are exceptionally fine. <br /> <br />SHY: A person who releases silent farts and then blushes. <br /> <br />IMPUDENT: A person who boldly farts out loud and then laughs. <br /> <br />UNFORTUNATE: A person who tries awfully hard to fart but shits instead. <br /> <br />SCIENTIFIC: A person who farts regularly but is only concerned about pollution. <br /> <br />NERVOUS: A person who stops in the middle of his fart. <br /> <br />HONEST: A person who admits he farted but offers good medical reasons. <br /> <br />DISHONEST: A person who farts and then blames the dog. <br /> <br />FOOLISH: A person who suppresses a fart for hours and hours. <br /> <br />THRIFTY: A person who has several good farts in reserve. <br /> <br />ANTI-SOCIAL: A person who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy. <br /> <br />STRATEGIC: A person who conceals his farts with loud coughing. <br /> <br />SADISTIC: A person who farts in bed and then fluffs the cover over his bed mate. <br /> <br />INTELLECTUAL: A person who can determine from the smell of his neighbor's fart precisely the latest food item consumed. <br /> <br />ATHLETIC: A person who farts at the slightest exertion. <br /> <br />MISERABLE: A person who would truly love to, but can't fart at all. <br /> <br />SENSITIVE: A person who farts and then starts crying. <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85537199?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-855256032002-12-05T14:47:00.000+08:002002-12-05T14:47:23.350+08:00 <br />top five street food i like: <br /> <br />sa malamig <br />lumpiang sariwa <br />fish ball <br />inihaw na isau <br />chiken intestines <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85525603?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-855242422002-12-05T14:06:00.000+08:002002-12-05T14:06:06.640+08:00favorite lines from the gladiator.. <br /> <br />Maximus: If you find yourself alone riding in green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled, for you are in Elysium and you're already dead!!! <br /> <br />Quintus: People should know when they are conquered <br /> <br />Maximus: On my signal, unleash hell <br /> <br />Maximus: You know, dirt cleans off a lot easier than blood <br /> <br />Proximo: Those giraffes you sold me won't mate. They just walk around eating, and not mating. You sold me queer giraffes...I want my money back. <br /> <br />Proximo: Ultimately, we're all dead men, sadly we cannot choose how, but we can decide how we meet that end in order that we are remembered as men. <br /> <br />Maximus: Frost...sometimes it makes the blade stick <br /> <br />Commodus: This vexes me. I'm terribly vexed. <br /> <br />Maximus: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius: commander of the armies of the North, general of the Felix legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next. <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85524242?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-854802712002-12-04T21:28:00.000+08:002002-12-04T21:30:31.000+08:005 favorite movies i have on dvd <br /> <br />spirited away <br />american beauty <br />godfather part 1 <br />wizard of oz <br />groundhog day <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85480271?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-854800572002-12-04T21:23:00.000+08:002002-12-04T21:23:15.436+08:005 favorite ulam of all time <br /> <br />inihaw na liempo <br />binagoongan <br />menudo <br />sinigang <br />adobo <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85480057?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-854798482002-12-04T21:17:00.000+08:002002-12-04T21:17:18.556+08:00 <br />top five pinoy rock songs i like... <br /> <br />kundi man <br />pinay <br />tao <br />wally's blues <br />ang himig natin <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85479848?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-854693332002-12-04T14:32:00.000+08:002002-12-04T14:32:04.636+08:00 <br />top five beatles songs of all time: <br /> <br />because <br />for no one <br />in my life <br />strawberry fields forever <br />a day in a life <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85469333?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3996110.post-854680702002-12-04T13:58:00.000+08:002002-12-04T21:06:33.000+08:00the jay david, top five records of all time: <br /> <br />5. eric clapton, unplugged <br />4. tapestry, carol king <br />3. dark side of the moon, pink floyd <br />2. white album, the beatles <br />1. running on empty, jackson browne <br /> <br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3996110-85468070?l=mahiwagangjeproks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>BatJaynoreply@blogger.com0