ABOUT FARTS...so, What Are You?

VAIN: A person who loves the smell of his own farts.

AMIABLE: A person who loves the smell of other people's farts.

PROUD: A person who thinks his farts are exceptionally fine.

SHY: A person who releases silent farts and then blushes.

IMPUDENT: A person who boldly farts out loud and then laughs.

UNFORTUNATE: A person who tries awfully hard to fart but shits instead.

SCIENTIFIC: A person who farts regularly but is only concerned about pollution.

NERVOUS: A person who stops in the middle of his fart.

HONEST: A person who admits he farted but offers good medical reasons.

DISHONEST: A person who farts and then blames the dog.

FOOLISH: A person who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.

THRIFTY: A person who has several good farts in reserve.

ANTI-SOCIAL: A person who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.

STRATEGIC: A person who conceals his farts with loud coughing.

SADISTIC: A person who farts in bed and then fluffs the cover over his bed mate.

INTELLECTUAL: A person who can determine from the smell of his neighbor's fart precisely the latest food item consumed.

ATHLETIC: A person who farts at the slightest exertion.

MISERABLE: A person who would truly love to, but can't fart at all.

SENSITIVE: A person who farts and then starts crying.